English drama -- 17th century; English drama -- Early modern and Elizabethan, 1500-1600
_Flam._ Remember this, you slave; when knaves come to preferment, they
rise as gallowses are raised i' the Low Countries, one upon another's
shoulders. [_Exeunt_ BRACHIANO, FLAMINEO, _and_ Doctor.
SCENE II.--_The same._
FRANCISCO DE MEDICIS, MONTICELSO, CAMILLO, _and_ MARCELLO.
_Mont._ Here is an emblem, nephew, pray peruse it:
'Twas thrown in at your window.
_Cam._ At my window!
Here is a stag, my lord, hath shed his horns,
And, for the loss of them, the poor beast weeps:
The word,[40] _Inopem me copia fecit_.[41]
_Mont._ That is,
Plenty of horns hath made him poor of horns.
_Cam._ What should this mean?
_Mont._ I'll tell you: 'tis given out
You are a cuckold.
_Cam._ Is it given out so?
I had rather such report as that, my lord,
Should keep within doors.
_Fran. de Med._ Have you any children?
_Cam._ None, my lord.
_Fran. de Med._ You are the happier:
I'll tell you a tale.
_Cam._ Pray, my lord.
_Fran. de Med._ An old tale.
Upon a time Phœbus, the god of light,
Or him we call the Sun, would needs be married:
The gods gave their consent, and Mercury
Was sent to voice it to the general world.
But what a piteous cry there straight arose
Amongst smiths and felt-makers, brewers and cooks,
Reapers and butterwomen, amongst fishmongers,
And thousand other trades, which are annoyed
By his excessive heat! 'twas lamentable.
They came to Jupiter all in a sweat,
And do forbid the bans. A great fat cook
Was made their speaker, who entreats of Jove
That Phœbus might be gelded; for, if now,
When there was but one sun, so many men
Were like to perish by his violent heat,
What should they do if he were married,
And should beget more, and those children
Make fire-works like their father? So say I;
Only I will apply it to your wife:
Her issue, should not providence prevent it,
Would make both nature, time, and man repent it.
_Mont._ Look you, cousin,
Go, change the air, for shame; see if your absence
Will blast your cornucopia. Marcello
Is chosen with you joint commissioner
For the relieving our Italian coast
From pirates.
_Mar._ I am much honoured in't.
_Cam._ But, sir,
Ere I return, the stag's horns may be sprouted
Greater than those are shed.
_Mont._ Do not fear it:
I'll be your ranger.
_Cam._ You must watch i' the nights;
Then's the most danger.
_Fran. de Med._ Farewell, good Marcello:
All the best fortunes of a soldier's wish
Bring you a-ship-board!
_Cam._ Were I not best, now I am turned soldier,
Ere that I leave my wife, sell all she hath,
And then take leave of her?
_Mont._ I expect good from you,
Your parting is so merry.
_Cam._ Merry, my lord! o' the captain's humour right;
I am resolvèd to be drunk this night.
[_Exeunt_ CAMILLO _and_ MARCELLO.
_Fran. de Med._ So, 'twas well fitted: now shall we discern
How his wished absence will give violent way
To Duke Brachiano's lust.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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