Westward hoboes : $b ups and downs of frontier motoringDixon, Winifred Hawkridge
General
Westward hoboes : $b ups and downs of frontier motoring
Dixon, Winifred Hawkridge
Automobile travel; West (U.S.) -- Description and travel
Next day, news came that our boat had docked, and telephoning revealed
that the car was safely landed. There are joys to telephoning in the
South. Central is courteous and eager to please, and the voices of
strangers with whom one does curt business at home become here so soft
and winning that old friendships are immediately cemented, repartee
indulged in, and the receiver hung up with a feeling of regret. That is
the kind of voice the agent for the Mallory Line had. To be sure, it
took us a day to get the car from the dock to the street, when it would
have taken half an hour at home, but it was a day devoted to the finer
shades of intercourse and good fellowship. I reached the dock half an
hour before lunch time.
“Yes’m, the office is open, but I reckon yo’ won’t find any hands to
move yo’ car,” was the accurate prediction of the official to whom I
applied. “Pretty nearly lunch time, yo’ know.”
So I waited, filling in time by answering the guarded questions the
watchman put to me. I was almost as fascinating an object of attention
to him as his Bull Durham, though I must admit that when there was a
conflict between us, I never won, except once, when he asked where the
car and I came from.
“Massachusetts?” Bull Durham lost.
A great idea struggled for expression. I could see him searching for
the right, the inevitable word. I could see it born, as triumph and
amusement played over his features. Then caution--should he spring it
all at once or save it for a climax? Nonchalantly, as if such epigrams
were likely to occur to him any time, he got it off.
“You’re a long ways from _home_, ain’t yo’?”
With the air of saying something equally witty, I replied, “I surely
am.”
Like “When did you stop beating your wife,” his question was one of
those which has all the repartee its own way. For six months, we were
to hear it several times daily, but it always came as a shock, and
as if hypnotized, we were never to alter our response. And it was so
true! We _were_ a long ways from home, further than we then realized.
At times we seemed so long that we wondered if we should ever see home
again. But we were never too far to meet some man, wittier than his
fellows, who defined our location accurately.
After his diagnosis and my acceptance of it, further conversation
became anticlimactic. The “hands” were still absent at lunch, so I
followed their example, and returning at two, found them still at
lunch. But at last the agent drifted in, and three or four interested
and willing colored boys. Everybody was pleasant, nobody was hurried,
we exchanged courtesies, and signed papers, and after we really got
down to business, in a surprisingly few minutes the car was rolled
across the street by five-man power, while I lolled behind the steering
wheel like Cleopatra in her galley. At the doorway the agent halted me.
“Massachusetts car?” he asked.
“Yes, sir,” said I. Were there to be complications?
In a flash he countered.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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