At first that was all. She merely turned and panted. But as she
whirled and whirled, new moods and figures seemed to force themselves
upon her. She lifted her hands and swayed them about above her head
gracefully. She was posturing she knew, but why she had no idea.
It all came upon her as suddenly and as uncontrollably as a blush.
She was whirling around the room, now slow, now fast, but always
with her arms held out lissom, like a dancing-girl's. Sometimes
her body bent this way, and sometimes that, her hands keeping time
to her movements meanwhile in long graceful curves, but all as if
compelled by some extrinsic necessity.
It was an instinct within her over which she had no control. Surely,
surely, she must be possessed. A spirit that was not her seemed to
be catching her round the waist, and twisting her about, and making
her spin headlong over the floor through this wild fierce dance.
It was terrible, terrible. Yet she could not prevent it. A force
not her own seemed to sustain and impel her.
And all the time, as she whirled, she was conscious also of some
strange dim need. A sense of discomfort oppressed her arms. She
hadn't everything she required for this solitary orgy. Something
more was lacking her. Something essential, vital. But what on earth
it could be she knew not; she knew not.
By-and-by she paused, and, as she glanced right and left, the sense
of discomfort grew clearer and more vivid. It was her hands that
were wrong. Her hands were empty. She must have something to fill
them. Something alive, lithe, curling, sinuous. These wavings
and swayings, to this side and to that, seemed so meaningless and
void--without some life to guide them. There was nothing for her
to hold; nothing to tame and subdue; nothing to cling and writhe
and give point to her movements. Oh! heavens, how horrible!
She drew herself up suddenly, and by dint of a fierce brief effort
of will repressed for awhile the mad dance that overmastered her.
The spirit within her, if spirit it were, kept quiet for a moment,
awed and subdued by her proud determination. Then it began once
more and led her resistlessly forward. She moved over to the chest
of drawers still rhythmically and with set steps, but to the phantom
strain of some unheard low music. The music was running vaguely
through her head all the time--wild Aeolian music--it sounded like
a rude tune on a harp or zither. And surely the cymbals clashed now
and again overhead; and the timbrel rang clear; and the castanets
tinkled, keeping time with the measure. She stood still and listened.
No, no, not a sound save the rain on the roof. It was the music of
her own heart, beating irregularly and fiercely to an intermittent
lilt, like a Hungarian waltz or a Roumanian tarantella.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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