I felt my life was a bad one, and that people ought not to live so; yet I did not come to the most natural and obvious conclusion: that I must first reform my own mode of life before I could have any conception of how to reform others. And so I began at the wrong end, as it were. I was living in town, and wished to improve the lives of the men there; but I soon became convinced that I had no power to do so; and then I began to ponder over the _nature_ of town life and town misery. I said to myself over and over again, "What is this town life and town misery? And why, while living in town, am I unable to help the town poor?" The only reply I found was, that I was powerless to do anything for them, First, because there were too many collected together in one place; Secondly, because none of them were at all like those in the country. And again I asked myself, "Why are there so many here, and in what do they differ from the country poor?" To both these questions the answer was the same. The poor are numerous in towns because all who have nothing to subsist on in the country are collected there round the rich; and their peculiarity is due to the fact that they have all come into the towns from the country to get a living. (If there are any town poor born there, whose fathers and grandfathers were town born, these in their turn originally came there to get a living.) But what are we to understand by the expression, "getting a living in town"? There is something strange in the expression; it sounds like a joke when we reflect on its meaning. How is it that from the country,--i.e., from places where there are woods, meadows, corn and cattle, where the earth yields the treasures of fertility--men come away, to get a living in a place where there are none of these advantages, but only stones and dust? What then, do the words, "getting a living in town," mean? Such a phrase is constantly used, both by the employed and their employers, as if it were quite clear and intelligible. I remember now all the hundreds and thousands of town people living well or ill with whom I had spoken about their object in coming here; and all of them, without exception, told me they had quitted their villages "to get a living"; that "Moscow neither sows nor reaps, yet lives in wealth"; that in Moscow there is abundance of everything; and that, therefore, in Moscow one may get the money which is needed in the country for corn, cottages, horses, and the other essentials of life. But, in fact, the country is the source of all wealth; there, only, are real riches,--corn, woods, horses, and everything necessary. Why go to towns, then, to get what is to be had in the country? And why should people carry away from the country into the towns the things that are necessary for country people,--flour, oats, horses, and cattle?