What will they say at Brompton? A Comedetta, in One Act.Coyne, J. Stirling (Joseph Stirling)
General
What will they say at Brompton? A Comedetta, in One Act.
Coyne, J. Stirling (Joseph Stirling)
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
TODD. (_sits_ R. _of table_) Ah! I’ve the appetite of a Board of
Aldermen! (MARIETTA _helps him to some of the stew_) And this stew is
really so tempting! I’ll make no apology. (_eats greedily_) Never
tasted anything so savory. Game—eh? Delicious! How d’ye make it?
Infinitely superior to my lost Laura’s giblet pie! What a flavour! Ah!
this is happiness! I’ll take another spoonful, if you please. Hah! I
begin to feel I’m a lonely cockle on life’s dull shore.
(_while he eats with his head bent over his plate_, JACOPO, _who has come
into the apartment_, R., _motions_ MARIETTA _away_; _she crosses quietly
at back to_ R. _and exits_, R. 2 E. JACOPO _then takes her place_ L. _of
table_. MRS. TODD _retires as_ JACOPO _appears_)
TODD. (_still eating_, _not perceiving_ JACOPO) Hah! I never thought to
love again—you put tomatoes in your stew?—but from the moment I beheld
these lovely features, the image of my lost Laura has been growing
fainter and fainter in my bosom—like a faded daguerreotype—mushrooms, I
perceive—and when I gaze on that beauteous face—(_he lifts his eyes_,
_and seeing_ JACOPO _looking sternly at him_, _he remains transfixed with
terror_, _holding in the air the spoon he was conveying to his mouth_)
JACOPO. (_after a pause_) Proceed with your compliment, signor.
TODD. I—I—I—beg pardon—the—the—Collector, I presume.
JACOPO. (_brusquely_) The master of this house.
TODD. Oh! indeed! (_aside_) Todd, you are a dead mackarel!
JACO. You tremble.
TODD. Oh, dear no, not at all. Ha, ha, ha! Merely a slight shiver—the
evening’s rather cool.
JACO. Drink then, ’twill warm you. (_pours out wine for_ TODD)
TODD. (_takes the glass and puts it down again_—_aside_) It may be
poisoned! (_with affected indifference_) Thank you, I’m not thirsty.
JACO. Then I am. (_fills for himself_, _and drinks_)
TODD. (_aside_) He drinks himself. There can be no danger. On second
thoughts, I’ll do myself the honour of drinking your health. (_drinks_)
JACO. Right. (_aside_) Now we may speak without reserve, and first to
introduce myself, (_rises and bows_) I’m Jacopo Terreboli at your
service!
TODD. Terreboli! That desperate robber and cut-throat! I—I—beg
pardon—I didn’t mean to—(_rising_)
JACO. Make no apologies, signor, I’m the identical individual;—sit down
and finish your supper.
TODD. Thank you, my appetite’s gone, and if you’ve no objection, I’d
rather follow it.
JACO. (_fiercely_) Sit down! (TODD _drops into his chair_) Now we can
proceed to business. (_placing pistols on table_, _and playing with
dagger_, TODD _turns muzzle of pistols from him_)
TODD. (_apart_) Private and confidential assassination!
JACO. Why don’t you drink? (_pours out wine_) Every brave man drinks.
TODD. You think I’m brave? (_drinks_)
JACO. You’re a devil! And yet how we may be deceived by appearances—to
judge by your looks—I should say you were a coward.
TODD. (_aside_) Nature writes a plain hand!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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