When the Birds Begin to SingGraham, Winifred (Matilda Winifred Muriel)
General
When the Birds Begin to Sing
Graham, Winifred (Matilda Winifred Muriel)
English fiction -- 19th century
Eleanor is glad. She is fascinated by the profound interest he
displays when she speaks of herself. Besides, from what he tells her
she gathers he is a man of genius, destroyed by pessimism, given to
analyse human hearts and discover their misery, to look deeply into the
lives of his fellow creatures, below the platitudes and
conventionalities. He is richly endowed with the divine gift of
sympathy, the supreme art of discrimination, yet occasionally reveals
the witty spirits of the cynic, who is cynical to please.
He sees through Eleanor's society prattle, the guileless mind, the
childish innocence. He recognises that as yet she is undeveloped--he
mentally reviews her. She is absurd, improbable, and therefore
fascinating. She is like a book with the best chapters torn out--you
long to find them, and never rest till you succeed.
Palmists or clairvoyants would prophesy a future for her, simply
through looking in her eyes; but whether notoriety is to be won by
downfalling or uprising were better left unstated. Eleanor, he
decides, is neither highly-strung nor excitable, but outspoken, fresh,
and conscious of her beauty, without conceit. He thinks he loves her
at first sight, the lukewarm love arising from admiration, which a man
may feel towards a married woman, without blame, but at the close of
the evening he is certain of it.
"What have we been talking about all to-night?" asks Eleanor, with a
puzzled frown, and a smile which counteracts it. "So much was
frivolous and foolish I cannot remember."
"Yet every word is hidden in some secret cell of your brain. Oh, that
the secret cells could be opened and revealed to our nearest and
dearest. What countless forgotten treasures might be restored."
"Or what ill-spoken words and evil quarrels revived," adds Eleanor
wisely.
"Thus speaks a guilty conscience," he retorts. "I could sum up my life
on a sheet of foolscap. 'Preface; apparent folly, covering intents and
purposes. A boyhood of ambition, a manhood of misfortune.'"
"Misfortune!"
"Yes, since I grew to realise facts, to see men and women as they
_are_, not as they appear! Sometimes the bare word 'reality' fills me
with such loathing for this paltry world, with its pigmy minds and
soulless bodies, that I can hardly control my contempt. I pull myself
together, and pray for a new set of nerves, a stronger heart, and a
better flow of healthy blood to the brain."
"What a pity that nerves cannot be purchased like false teeth," says
Eleanor laughing.
"Nerves are the finest satire on our human organisation, and our
bodies, each a theatre of perpetual activity, the most confusing
mystery of all. I believe in a dual nature existing in men and women,
but the difficulties which bar our progress to perfect knowledge of
each other cannot be overcome."
"Things that can't be understood are invariably irritating," sighs
Eleanor.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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