Seem to like and approve of everything at first Sentiments that were never felt, pompously described She has all the reading that a woman should have She who conquers only catches a Tartar Silence in love betrays more woe Spare the persons while you lash the crimes Steady assurance, with seeming modesty Suspicion of age, no woman, let her be ever so old, ever forgive Take the hue of the company you are with Taking up adventitious, proves their want of intrinsic merit The present moments are the only ones we are sure of Those whom you can make like themselves better Timidity and diffidence To be heard with success, you must be heard with pleasure To be pleased one must please Trifle only with triflers; and be serious only with the serious Trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon Unwilling and forced; it will never please Well dressed, not finely dressed What is impossible, and what is only difficult What pleases you in others, will in general please them in you Whatever real merit you have, other people will discover Wish you, my dear friend, as many happy new years as you deserve Women choose their favorites more by the ear Words are the dress of thoughts Writing what may deserve to be read You must be respectable, if you will be respected Your character there, whatever it is, will get before you here LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1751 [LC#05][lc05sxxx.xxx]3355 If you find that you have a hastiness in your temper, which unguardedly breaks out into indiscreet sallies, or rough expressions, to either your superiors, your equals, or your inferiors, watch it narrowly, check it carefully, and call the 'suaviter in modo' to your assistance: at the first impulse of passion, be silent till you can be soft. He often is unintelligible to his readers, and sometimes so, I dare say, to himself. "The prostrate lover, when he lowest lies, But stoops to conquer, and but kneels to rise." We are so made, we love to be pleased better than to be informed; information is, in a certain degree, mortifying, as it implies our previous ignorance; it must be sweetened to be palatable. Free from the guilt: be free from the suspicion, too. Mankind, as I have often told you, are more governed by appearances than by realities; and with regard to opinion, one had better be really rough and hard, with the appearance of gentleness and softness, than just the reverse.