It is not then strange that I should have thought and speculated much
about madness.--What does its frequent impulse to suicide indicate? May
it not be its main instinct to destroy itself as an evil thing? May not
the impulse arise from some unconscious conviction that there is for it
no remedy but the shuffling off of this mortal coil--nature herself
dimly urging through the fumes of the madness to the one blow which
lets in the light and air? Doubtless, if in the mind so sadly unhinged,
the sense of a holy presence could be developed--the sense of a love
that loves through all vagaries--of a hiding-place from forms of evil
the most fantastic--of a fatherly care that not merely holds its insane
child in its arms, but enters into the chaos of his imagination, and
sees every wildest horror with which it swarms; if, I say, the
conviction of such a love dawned on the disordered mind, the man would
live in spite of his imaginary foes, for he would pray against them as
sure of being heard as St Paul when he prayed concerning the thorn from
which he was not delivered, but against which he was sustained. And who
can tell how often this may be the fact--how often the lunatic also
lives by faith? Are not the forms of madness most frequently those of
love and religion? Certainly, if there be a God, he does not forget his
frenzied offspring; certainly he is more tender over them than any
mother over her idiot darling; certainly he sees in them what the eye
of brother or sister cannot see. But some of them, at least, have not
enough of such support to be able to go on living; and, for my part, I
confess I rejoice as often as I hear that one has succeeded in breaking
his prison bars. When the crystal shrine has grown dim, and the fair
forms of nature are in their entrance contorted hideously; when the
sunlight itself is as blue lightning, and the wind in the summer trees
is as ‘a terrible sound of stones cast down, or a rebounding echo from
the hollow mountains;’ when the body is no longer a mediator between
the soul and the world, but the prison-house of a lying gaoler and
torturer--how can I but rejoice to hear that the tormented captive has
at length forced his way out into freedom?
When I look behind me, I can see but little through the surging lurid
smoke of that awful time. The first sense of relief came when I saw the
body of Charley laid in the holy earth. For the earth _is_ the
Lord’s--and none the less holy that the voice of the priest may have
left it without his consecration. Surely if ever the Lord laughs in
derision, as the Psalmist says, it must be when the voice of a man
would in _his_ name exclude his fellows from their birthright. O Lord,
gather thou the outcasts of thy Israel, whom the priests and the rulers
of thy people have cast out to perish.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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