_Hip._ I don't understand you. _Mons._ But I do, a pox take him! and the custom that so orders it, forsooth! that if a lady abuse or affront a man, presently the gallant must be beaten; nay, what's more unreasonable, if a woman abuse her husband, the poor cuckold must bear the shame as well as the injury. [_Aside._ _Hip._ But what's the matter, master? what was it you said? _Ger._ I say, pleasant, cunning, jilting lady, though you make him a cuckold, it will not be revenge enough for me upon him for marrying you. _Hip._ How! my surly, huffing, jealous, senseless, saucy master? _Mons._ Nay, nay, faith, give losers leave to speak, losers of mistresses especially, ha! ha! ha! Besides, your anger is too great a favour for him; I scorn to honour him with mine you see. _Hip._ I tell you, my saucy master, my cousin shall never be made that monstrous thing you mention, by me. _Mons._ Thank you, I vow and swear, cousin; no, no, I never thought I should. _Ger._ Sure you marry him by the sage maxim of your sex, which is, wittols make the best husbands, that is, cuckolds. _Hip._ Indeed, master, whatsoever you think, I would sooner choose you for that purpose than him. _Mons._ Ha! ha! ha! there she was with him, i'faith;--I thank you for that, cousin, I vow and swear. _Hip._ Nay, he shall thank me for that too:--but how came you two to quarrel? I thought, cousin, you had had more wit than to quarrel, or more kindness for me than to quarrel here. What if my father, hearing the bustle, should have come in? he would have soon discovered our false dancing-master (for passion unmasks every man), and then the result of your quarrel had been my ruin. _Mons._ Nay, you had both felt his desperate deadly daunting dagger:--there are your d's for you! _Hip._ Go, go presently, therefore, and hinder my father from coming in, whilst I put my master into a better humour, that we may not be discovered, to the prevention of our wedding, or worse when he comes; go, go. _Mons._ Well, well, I will, cousin. _Hip._ Be sure you let him not come in this good while. _Mons._ No, no, I warrant you.--[_Goes out and returns._]--But if he should come before I would have him, I'll come before him, and cough and hawk soundly, that you may not be surprised. Won't that do well, cousin? _Hip._ Very well, pray begone.--[_Exit_ Monsieur.] Well, master, since I find you are quarrelsome and melancholy, and would have taken me away without a portion, three infallible signs of a true lover, faith here's my hand now in earnest, to lead me a dance as long as I live. _Ger._ How's this! you surprise me as much, as when first I found so much beauty and wit in company with so much innocency. But, dearest, I would be assured of what you say, and yet dare not ask the question. You h----do not abuse me again? You h----will fool me no more sure? _Hip._ Yes, but I will sure. _Ger._ How? nay, I was afraid on't.