_Spark._ What! drawn upon your wife? You should never do that, but at night in the dark, when you can't hurt her. This is my sister-in-law, is it not? ay, faith, e'en our country Margery; [_Pulls aside her handkerchief_] one may know her. Come, she and you must go dine with me; dinner's ready, come. But where's my wife? is she not come home yet? where is she? _Pinch._ Making you a cuckold; 'tis that they all do, as soon as they can. _Spark._ What, the wedding-day? no, a wife that designs to make a cully of her husband will be sure to let him win the first stake of love, by the world. But come, they stay dinner for us: come, I'll lead down our Margery. _Pinch._ No--sir, go, we'll follow you. _Spark._ I will not wag without you. _Pinch._ This coxcomb is a sensible torment to me amidst the greatest in the world. [_Aside._ _Spark._ Come, come, Madam Margery. _Pinch._ No; I'll lead her my way: what, would you treat your friends with mine, for want of your own wife?--[_Leads her to the other door, and locks her in and returns._] I am contented my rage should take breath--[_Aside._ _Spark._ I told Horner this. _Pinch._ Come now. _Spark._ Lord, how shy you are of your wife! but let me tell you, brother, we men of wit have amongst us a saying, that cuckolding, like the small-pox, comes with a fear; and you may keep your wife as much as you will out of danger of infection, but if her constitution incline her to't, she'll have it sooner or later, by the world, say they. _Pinch._ [_Aside._] What a thing is a cuckold, that every fool can make him ridiculous!--[_Aloud._] Well, sir--but let me advise you, now you are come to be concerned, because you suspect the danger, not to neglect the means to prevent it, especially when the greatest share of the malady will light upon your own head, for Hows'e'er the kind wife's belly comes to swell, The husband breeds for her, and first is ill. [_Exeunt._ ACT THE FIFTH. SCENE I.--PINCHWIFE'S _House._ _Enter_ PINCHWIFE _and_ Mrs. PINCHWIFE. _A table and candle._ _Pinch._ Come, take the pen and make an end of the letter, just as you intended; if you are false in a tittle, I shall soon perceive it, and punish you as you deserve.--[_Lays his hand on his sword._] Write what was to follow--let's see--"You must make haste, and help me away before to-morrow, or else I shall be for ever out of your reach, for I can defer no longer our"--What follows "our"? _Mrs. Pinch._ Must all out, then, bud?--Look you there, then. [Mrs. PINCHWIFE _takes the pen and writes._ _Pinch._ Let's see--"For I can defer no longer our--wedding--Your slighted Alithea."--What's the meaning of this? my sister's name to't? speak, unriddle. _Mrs. Pinch._ Yes, indeed, bud. _Pinch._ But why her name to't? speak--speak, I say. _Mrs. Pinch._ Ay, but you'll tell her then again. If you would not tell her again-- _Pinch._ I will not:--I am stunned, my head turns round.--Speak.