“If you would like the hose,” said he, “I think you’ll find it in the garden.” His daughter cut his observations short, however, by brandishing the telegram before him. Directly he read it, the change in his tone and manner was almost ludicrous. “Dear me!” he said. “How very good of Stoddart. I’m very pleased, I’m sure. I congratulate you heartily, my boy, very heartily. Laura, will you please have the goodness to ring for Jennings. We must celebrate this auspicious occasion in the time-honoured way I think.” “Hear, hear!” said the full assembly. “Only time on record, Father, you know,” said Grace, who was trying desperately hard to keep her enthusiasm under restraint, “that Stoddy’s ever taken two of one family together. And who’ll say dreams are rot now?” she demanded fiercely. “What price mine? Hasn’t it come true?” “There’s no ‘name inadvertently omitted’ about it, though,” said the literal Charlie. “All the same,” said Archie, “it’s near enough to give Grace no end of a reputation with the Society of Psychical Research.” “The Society of Sikey--what?” said Grace. “Mustn’t it hurt you, Archie, to be so clever?” The apparition of the butler, however, restored the tone to the proceedings. “I think, Jennings,” said the Rector, “that there should be just two bottles of that champagne left in the third bin. Will you please bring it up.” “Miss Laura had it yesterday, sir,” said Jennings. “Miss Laura had it yesterday, sir,” said the Rector, with the majesty of an archbishop. “But pray, sir, will you have the goodness to explain what Miss Laura has to do with it?” “Miss Laura came to me yesterday, sir,” said Jennings apprehensively, “and told me to give her the two remaining bottles. She said that she would take all the responsibility, sir.” “Quite right, Jennings,” said Grace, with a courageous promptitude that I am afraid commanded the admiration of us all. “I did say I would take all the responsibility. You see it’s like this, Father. I couldn’t give a lot of common grocery to a set of county men, two of ’em going out with Stoddy, could I?” “There was only one of ’em going out with Stoddy yesterday, though,” said her enemy of Harrow. “I’ll defy anybody to say that there’s not two now, though,” said Grace. “And it was the Little Clumpton match, you know, Father; and it was an awful hot day, an’ awful fagging, and I knew you wouldn’t mind. Besides, I couldn’t have given anything common to two men going out with Stoddy, could I?” “Well,” said her magnanimous parent, “on due consideration, I’m inclined to think you couldn’t.” “That’s all right then,” said Grace cheerfully. To describe in detail the festivities attendant on Charlie’s honours is by no means necessary, and perhaps not altogether politic. All I need say is, that it was such a shameful hour when the Optimist and I remembered it was time to go home that everybody simply scouted the idea.