Wilson's Tales of the Borders and of Scotland, Volume 21
General
Wilson's Tales of the Borders and of Scotland, Volume 21
Scottish Borders (Scotland) -- Fiction
My grandmother had attained a very advanced old age, yet was she
straight in person, and perfect in all her mental faculties. Her
countenance, which I still see distinctly, was expressive of good-will;
and the wrinkles on her brow served to add a kind of intellectual
activity to a face naturally soft, and even comely. She had told me so
many stories, given me so many good advices, initiated me so carefully
in the elements of all learning, "the small and capital letters," and,
lastly, had so frequently interposed betwixt me and parental
chastisement, that I bore her as much good-will and kindly feeling as a
boy of seven years could reasonably be expected to exhibit. True it is,
and of verity, that this kindly feeling was not incompatible with many
acts of annoyance, for which I now take shame and express regret; but
these acts were anything but malevolent, being committed under the view
of self-indulgence merely. It was, therefore, with infinite concern that
I received the intelligence from my mother that grannie was, in all
probability, on the point of leaving us, and for ever.
"Leaving us, and for ever," sounded in my ears like a dream of the
night, in which I had seen the stream which passed our door swell
suddenly into a torrent, and the torrent into a flood, carrying me, and
everything around me, away in its waters. I felt unassured in regard to
my condition, and was half disposed to believe that I was still asleep
and imagining horrors! But when my mother told me that the disease which
had for days confined my grandmother to bed would end in death--in other
words, would place her alongside of my father's grave in the churchyard
of Closeburn--I felt that I was not asleep, but awake to some dreadful
reality, which was about to overtake us. From this period till within a
few hours of her dissolution, I kept cautiously and carefully aloof from
all intercourse with my grandmother--I felt, as it were, unwilling to
renew an intercourse which was so certainly, and so soon, and so
permanently to be interrupted; so I betook myself to the hills, and to
the pursuit of all manner of bees and butterflies. I would not, in fact,
rest; and as I lay extended on my back amidst the heath, and marked the
soft and filmy cloud swimming slowly along, "making the blue one white,"
I thought of her who was dying, and of some holy and happy residence far
beyond the utmost elevation of cloud, or sun, or sky. Again and again I
have risen from such reveries to plunge myself headlong into the pool,
or pursue with increased activity the winged insects which buzzed and
flitted around me. Strange indeed are the impressions made upon our yet
unstamped, unbiassed nature; and could we in every instance recall them,
their history would be so unlike our more recent experience, as to make
us suspect our personal identity. I do not remember any more recent
feeling which corresponded in character and degree with this, whose
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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