Female friendship -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
“Never mind,” said Hal quickly. “It didn’t matter.” Then to Basil, in
explanation: “G said something about Doris’s fiancé, not knowing I was
his sister, but I quite forget what it was. Good-bye, G,” holding out a
frank hand. “I think you’re a delightful person, and I’m just as glad
as Basil that you weren’t left out of the alphabet.”
A few minutes later Doris came in, looking flushed and stealthy, and
the first thing Hal noticed was a loverly little diamond brooch she had
not seen before.
“What a darling brooch,” she exclaimed, after their greeting. “Did
Dudley give you that? He might have shown it to me.”
“No...” stammered Doris, turning red. “I’ve had it a long time. It’s
not real.”
“Well, it’s a wonderful imitation, then” said Hall a little drily—and
remembered the man like a pawnbroker’s shop.
Then Ethel joined them, and Hal’s quick eyes saw the still increasing
anxiety, just as surely as she saw the increased furtiveness in Doris’s
side-long glances. And because of all that she felt for Ethel, she
trust her own care into the background resolutely, and made the evening
as gay as she could while she was there.
Only afterwards she went home through the lamp-lit darkness, feeling as
if some vague shadow had descended silently upon her little world.
What was this insistent, nameless fear at her own heart? Why was
Lorraine weeping when she found her yesterday? Why was trouble steadily
gathering on Ethel’s face? What was this gossip about Doris?—
The gloom of a foggy night added to her depression. Why, in the tube
railway, did all these people about her look so white and tired and
lifeless? Did they just go on in their niches, in the same way that the
grotesque music-teacher had gone on in hers for all those monotonous
years; only to become like an uncared-for, unwanted letter of the
alphabet pushed in to fill up a blank in a big city at last?
Were they all gargoyles-fixed, rigid, joyless, carved things, fastened
in their respective niches, not for ornament, or for use specially, but
just because the general machine seemed to require them?
And if so—why?... why?... why?—
It was so easy to be joyous if one was made for it. Such a little would
make every one gay, if they were fashioned accordingly. What could be
the good of disfiguring a beautiful world with all these vacant,
expressionless, hopeless masks?
Hal did not read poetry. She was perfectly frank about being utterly
bored with it. When she had anything to say, she liked to say it
straight out, she explained, without twisting it about to make it rhyme
with something just shoved in to fill up the line; and she preferred
other people to do the same.
Yet, perhaps, at that particular moment, had she seen the lines:
“Ah Love! could thou and I with Fate conspire
To grasp this sorry Scheme of Things entire,
Would not we shatter it to bits—and then
Remould it nearer to the Heart’s Desire?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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