Wit Without Money; A Comedy: The Works of Francis Beaumont and John FletcherFletcher, John
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Wit Without Money; A Comedy: The Works of Francis Beaumont and John Fletcher
Fletcher, John
Comedy plays; English drama -- 17th century
Take me quickly, while I am in this vein, away with me, for if I have
but two hours to consider, all the widows in the world cannot recover
me.
_Wid._ If you will, go with me Sir.
_Val._ Yes marrie will I, but 'tis in anger yet, and I will marrie
thee, do not cross me; yes, and I will lie with thee, and get a whole
bundle of babies, and I will kiss thee, stand still and kiss me
handsomely, but do not provoke me, stir neither hand nor foot, for I am
dangerous, I drunk sack yesternight, do not allure me: Thou art no widow
of this world, come in pitie, and in spite I'le marrie thee, not a word
more, and I may be brought to love thee. [_Exeunt._
_Enter_ Merchant, _and_ Uncle, _at several doors_.
_Mer._ Well met again, and what good news yet?
_Unc._ Faith nothing.
_Mer._ No fruits of what we sowed?
_Unc._ Nothing I hear of.
_Mer._ No turning in this tide yet?
_Unc._ 'Tis all flood, and till that fall away, there's no expecting.
_Enter_ Fran. Isab. Lance, Shorthose, _a torch_.
_Mer._ Is not this his younger Brother?
_Unc._ With a Gentlewoman the widow's sister, as I live he smiles,
he has got good hold, why well said _Frank_ i'faith, let's stay and
mark.
_Isab._ Well, you are the prettiest youth, and so you have handled
me, think you ha' me sure.
_Fran._ As sure as wedlock.
_Isab._ You had best lie with me too.
_Fran._ Yes indeed will I, and get such black ey'd boyes.
_Unc._ God a Mercy, _Frank_.
_Isab._ This is a merrie world, poor simple Gentlewomen that think
no harm, cannot walk about their business, but they must be catcht up I
know not how.
_Fran._ I'le tell you, and I'le instruct ye too, have I caught you,
Mistress?
_Isab._ Well, and it were not for pure pity, I would give you the
slip yet, but being as it is.
_Fran._ It shall be better.
_Enter_ Valentine, Widow, _and_ Ralph, _with a torch_.
_Isab._ My sister, as I live, your Brother with her! sure, I think
you are the Kings takers.
_Unc._ Now it works.
_Val._ Nay, you shall know I am a man.
_Wid._ I think so.
_Val._ And such proof you shall have.
_Wid._ I pray speak softly.
_Val._ I'le speak it out Widow, yes and you shall confess too, I am
no Nurse-child, I went for a man, a good one, if you can beat me out
o'th' pit.
_Wid._ I did but jest with you.
_Val._ I'le handle you in earnest, and so handle you: Nay, when my
credit calls.
_Wid._ Are you mad?
_Val._ I am mad, I am mad.
_Fran._ Good morrow, Sir, I like your preparation.
_Val._ Thou hast been at it, _Frank_.
_Fran._ Yes faith, 'tis done Sir.
_Val._ Along with me then, never hang an arse, widow.
_Isab._ 'Tis to no purpose, sister.
_Val._ Well said Black-brows, advance your torches Gentlemen.
_Unc._ Yes, yes Sir.
_Val._ And keep your ranks.
_Mer._ _Lance_, carrie this before him.
_Unc._ Carrie it in state.
_Enter_ Musicians, Fount. Hare. Bel.
_Val._ What are you, Musicians? I know your coming, and what are
those behind you?
_Musi._ Gentlemen that sent us to give the Lady a good morrow.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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