Bildungsromans; France -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Villages -- France -- Fiction
letters to me had all the delicate refinement of those which I used to
write to people who did not matter, and shewed me the same apparent
marks of affection, which it was so pleasant for me to receive from her.
But, as time went on, every refusal to see her disturbed me less. And as
she became less dear to me, my painful memories were no longer strong
enough to destroy by their incessant return the growing pleasure which I
found in thinking of Florence, or of Venice. I regretted, at such
moments, that I had abandoned the idea of diplomacy and had condemned
myself to a sedentary existence, in order not to be separated from a
girl whom I should not see again and had already almost forgotten. We
construct our house of life to suit another person, and when at length
it is ready to receive her that person does not come; presently she is
dead to us, and we live on, a prisoner within the walls which were
intended only for her. If Venice seemed to my parents to be a long way
off, and its climate treacherous, it was at least quite easy for me to
go, without tiring myself, and settle down at Balbec. But to do that I
should have had to leave Paris, to forego those visits thanks to which,
infrequent as they were, I might sometimes hear Mme. Swann telling me
about her daughter. Besides, I was beginning to find in them various
pleasures in which Gilberte had no part.
When spring drew round, and with it the cold weather, during an icy Lent
and the hailstorms of Holy Week, as Mme. Swann began to find it cold in
the house, I used often to see her entertaining her guests in her furs,
her shivering hands and shoulders hidden beneath the gleaming white
carpet of an immense rectangular muff and a cape, both of ermine, which
she had not taken off on coming in from her drive, and which suggested
the last patches of the snows of winter, more persistent than the rest,
which neither the heat of the fire nor the advancing season had
succeeded in melting. And the whole truth about these glacial but
already flowering weeks was suggested to me in this drawing-room, which
soon I should be entering no more, by other more intoxicating forms of
whiteness, that for example of the guelder-roses clustering, at the
summits of their tall bare stalks, like the rectilinear trees in
pre-raphaelite paintings, their balls of blossom, divided yet composite,
white as annunciating angels and breathing a fragrance as of lemons. For
the mistress of Tansonville knew that April, even an ice-bound April was
not barren of flowers, that winter, spring, summer are not held apart by
barriers as hermetic as might be supposed by the town-dweller who, until
the first hot day, imagines the world as containing nothing but houses
that stand naked in the rain. That Mme. Swann was content with the
consignments furnished by her Combray gardener, that she did not, by the
intervention of her own "special" florist, fill up the gaps left by an
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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