At this crisis in her despair Roger's note was handed to her,
and it was like the north star suddenly shining out on one who is
benighted and lost. It again kindled hope, without which mind and
body give way in fatal dejection. She kissed the missive passionately,
murmuring, with eyes heavenward, "If he can clear my name from
dishonor, if he will rescue my loved ones from the poverty and
shame which are now threatening such terrible evils, I will make
any sacrifice that he can ask. I will crush out my old vain love,
if I die in the effort. My heart shall not prove a traitor to those
who are true and loyal at such a time. He can save mamma, Belle,
and the children from hopeless poverty, and perhaps destruction.
If he will, and it is his wish, I'll give all there is left of my
unhappy self. I will be his loyal wife--would to God I could be
his loving wife! Oh, would to God he had loved Belle instead of me!
I could be devotion itself as his sister. But surely I can banish
my old fond dream--which was never more than a dream--when one so
deserving, so faithful, is willing to give me his strong, helpful
hand. We are both very young; it will be years before--before--and,
surely, in so long a time, I can conquer my infatuation for one
who has left me all these dreary months without a word. A woman's
heart cannot be proof against reason, gratitude, and the sacred
duty owed to those she loves best. At any rate, mine shall not be,
and if he still craves the loyalty and--and--yes, the love of one
so shamed and impoverished as I am, he shall have all-ALL," and her
face grew stern with her purpose of self-mastery. She forced down
some of the food he sent, and drank the coffee. "I will be brave,"
she murmured. "I will try to second his efforts to clear my name,
for death were better than shame. I shall, at least, try to deserve
his respect."
Then musingly she added, "How can my friends have gained any
information that would prove me innocent? Mother and Belle cannot
know anything definite, nor can Mr. Wentworth. He promised in that
brief whisper when he passed me in the street that he would prove
it. Can he have learned anything in his strange vigilance? It seems
impossible. Alas, I fear that their best hope is to show that I
have hitherto borne a good character, and yet if my present home
and our poverty are described, if--worse than all--papa appears in
the court-room, I fear they will think the worst," and something of
her old despair began to return when she heard approaching footsteps.
"Millie!" cried a loved and familiar voice. The key grated in the
lock, and in another moment she was sobbing on her mother's breast,
and her bruised heart was healed by the unutterable tenderness
of a mother's love. It filled the dark cell with the abounding,
undoubting, unquestioning spirit of unselfish devotion, which was
akin to the fragrance diffused from the broken box of alabaster.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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