Distress of mind, however, soon made her forget all this, as her
faculties slowly rallied from the shock they had received, and she
began to realize that she was charged with a crime of which it might
be difficult--perhaps impossible--to prove her innocence. At best,
she feared she would always be so clouded with suspicion that all
would refuse to employ her, and that her blighted life and undeserved
shame, added to her father's character, would drag the family down
to the lowest depths. The consequences to them all, and especially
to Belle, seemed so threatening and terrible that she wrung her
hands and moaned aloud.
At every sound she started up, nervous and morbidly apprehensive.
The grating of the key in the iron door had given her a sense of
relief and refuge. The massive bars that shut her in also shut out
the brutal and criminal, who were associated with a prison in her
mind; the thoughts of whom had filled her very soul with terror,
when she was first arrested. As it was early in the evening she
happened to be the first prisoner, and she prayed that there might
be no others, for the possibility that some foul, drunken man might
be thrust into an adjoining cell made her flesh creep. How many
long, sleepless hours must pass before morning could bring any
hope of release! And yet she dreaded the coming day unspeakably,
for her path to freedom lay through a police court, with all its
horrible publicity. Her name might get into the papers, and proud
Mrs. Arnold treasure up every scrap of such intelligence about her.
The tidings of her shame might be sent to her who as Miss Wetheridge
had been her friend, and even she would shrink from one around whom
clung such disgraceful associations. Again and again she asked
herself, How could the charge against her be met? How could the
family live without her? What would become of them? Belle, alas,
would be rendered utterly reckless, because hopeless. The unhappy
prisoner was far beyond tears. Even her faith in God failed her,
for, seemingly, He had left her the victim of cruel wrong and
unredeemed misfortune. With her hot, dry eyes buried in her hands
she sat motionless and despairing, and the moments passed like
hours.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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