Like herself, Jordan was becoming more and more distressed, and only
with difficulty was he able to restrain his tears. 'Little sister,
little sister,' said he, 'you grieve me deeply. It is scarcely
reasonable of you to make yourself ill like this. I no longer recognise
you. You are usually so calm and sensible, and you are well aware what
firmness of spirit one ought to evince in order to resist the worries
of life.'
Then he wished to reason with her. 'Come,' he said, 'you have no
reproach to address to Luc?'
'Oh! none. I know that he has a great deal of affection for me. We are
very good friends,' she answered plaintively.
'Then you must not complain. He loves you as he is able to love, and
you do wrong in getting angry with him.'
'But I am not angry! I have no hate for anybody; I only suffer.'
Again did her sobs burst forth; again did distress master her, and
wring from her lips the cry: 'Why does he not love me? Why does he not
love me?'
'If he does not love you as you desire to be loved, little sister,'
said Jordan, 'it is because he does not know you well enough. No, he
does not know you as I do; he does not know that you are the best,
the gentlest, the most devoted and affectionate of women. You would
have been a fit companion and helper; the one that makes life's
pathway softer and easier. But the other came with her beauty, and
that assuredly was a powerful force, since he followed her without
perceiving you, and this although you already loved him. Come, my dear,
you must resign yourself.'
He had taken her in his arms, and he kissed her hair. But she still
went on struggling.
'No! no! I cannot.'
'Yes, you will resign yourself; you are too good, too intelligent to do
otherwise. Some day you will forget.'
'No! Never!'
'I did wrong to say that; I will not ask you to forget. Keep the
memory of it in your heart. But I do ask you to be resigned, because
I well know that you are capable of resignation, even to the point of
sacrifice. Think of all the disasters which would follow if you were
to rebel--to speak out! Our life would be broken up, our enterprises
shattered, and you would suffer a thousand times more than you do now.'
She interrupted him, quivering: 'Well, let our life be broken up! let
our enterprises be shattered! At least I shall have satisfied myself.
It is cruel of you, brother, to speak to me like that. You are an
egotist!'
'An egotist!' replied Jordan. 'When I am only thinking of you, my dear
little sister. At this moment grief is turning your wonted kindliness
to exasperation. But how bitter would be your remorse if I were to
allow you to destroy everything! You would no longer be able to live in
presence of the ruins that you would have piled up. Poor, dear girl!
you will resign yourself, and find happiness in abnegation and pure
affection.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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