It was the perusal of the end of Joyce's letter that had brought
Marian Ashurst into this state; it was the realisation of the joy
which, in his utter devotion to her, must have filled his heart as he
was enabled to offer to share what he imagined great prosperity with
her, that wrung her conscience and showed her treatment of him in its
worst light. It was of her alone that he thought when this offer was
made to him. He spoke of it simply as a means to an end--that end
their marriage and the comfort of her mother, whose burden he also
proposed to undertake. He said nothing of what hard work, what
hitherto unaccustomed responsibility, it would entail upon him; he
thought but of the peace of mind, the freedom from worry, the
happiness which he imagined it would bring to her. How noble he was
how selfless and single-minded! This was a man to live and die for and
with indeed! Was it too late? Should she go bravely and tell Mr.
Creswell all? He was sensible and kind-hearted, would see the
position, and appreciate her motives, though the blow would
be a heavy one for him. He would let her retract her consent, he
would---- Impossible! It might have been possible if she had read the
letter before she had told her mother of Mr. Creswell's proposal, but
now impossible. Even to her mother she could not lay bare the secrets
of her heart, disclose the slavery in which she was held by that one
ruling passion under whose control she had broken her own plighted
word, and run the risk of breaking one of the truest and noblest
hearts that ever beat.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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