Authors -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Women -- Societies and clubs -- Fiction
“Well--and then didn’t she tell Osric Dane that one of her books was
simply saturated with Xingu? Of course it was, if one of Mrs. Roby’s
rowdy friends had thrown it into the river!”
This surprising reconstruction of the scene in which they had just
participated left the members of the Lunch Club inarticulate. At length,
Mrs. Plinth, after visibly labouring with the problem, said in a heavy
tone: “Osric Dane was taken in too.”
Mrs. Leveret took courage at this. “Perhaps that’s what Mrs. Roby did
it for. She said Osric Dane was a brute, and she may have wanted to give
her a lesson.”
Miss Van Vluyck frowned. “It was hardly worth while to do it at our
expense.”
“At least,” said Miss Glyde with a touch of bitterness, “she succeeded
in interesting her, which was more than we did.”
“What chance had we?” rejoined Mrs. Ballinger.
“Mrs. Roby monopolised her from the first. And _that_, I’ve no doubt,
was her purpose--to give Osric Dane a false impression of her own
standing in the club. She would hesitate at nothing to attract
attention: we all know how she took in poor Professor Foreland.”
“She actually makes him give bridge-teas every Thursday,” Mrs. Leveret
piped up.
Laura Glyde struck her hands together. “Why, this is Thursday, and it’s
_there_ she’s gone, of course; and taken Osric with her!”
“And they’re shrieking over us at this moment,” said Mrs. Ballinger
between her teeth.
This possibility seemed too preposterous to be admitted. “She would
hardly dare,” said Miss Van Vluyck, “confess the imposture to Osric
Dane.”
“I’m not so sure: I thought I saw her make a sign as she left. If she
hadn’t made a sign, why should Osric Dane have rushed out after her?”
“Well, you know, we’d all been telling her how wonderful Xingu was, and
she said she wanted to find out more about it,” Mrs. Leveret said, with
a tardy impulse of justice to the absent.
This reminder, far from mitigating the wrath of the other members, gave
it a stronger impetus.
“Yes--and that’s exactly what they’re both laughing over now,” said
Laura Glyde ironically.
Mrs. Plinth stood up and gathered her expensive furs about her
monumental form. “I have no wish to criticise,” she said; “but unless
the Lunch Club can protect its members against the recurrence of
such--such unbecoming scenes, I for one--”
“Oh, so do I!” agreed Miss Glyde, rising also.
Miss Van Vluyck closed the Encyclopaedia and proceeded to button herself
into her jacket “My time is really too valuable--” she began.
“I fancy we are all of one mind,” said Mrs. Ballinger, looking
searchingly at Mrs. Leveret, who looked at the others.
“I always deprecate anything like a scandal--” Mrs. Plinth continued.
“She has been the cause of one to-day!” exclaimed Miss Glyde.
Mrs. Leveret moaned: “I don’t see how she _could!_” and Miss Van Vluyck
said, picking up her note-book: “Some women stop at nothing.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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