Your Child: Today and Tomorrow: Some Problems for Parents Concerning Punishment, Reasoning, Lies, Ideals and Ambitions, Fear, Work and Play, Imagination, Social Activities, Obedience, Adolescence, Will, HeredityGruenberg, Sidonie Matsner
Science
Your Child: Today and Tomorrow: Some Problems for Parents Concerning Punishment, Reasoning, Lies, Ideals and Ambitions, Fear, Work and Play, Imagination, Social Activities, Obedience, Adolescence, Will, Heredity
Gruenberg, Sidonie Matsner
Children
Investigation has shown that the sentimental or heroic element is
one that appeals to children so strongly that it may often lead to
what we adults would call lies, or it would seem to the child to
justify lying. The confession to a deed that he has not committed,
for the purpose of saving a weaker companion from punishment or
injury, seems to be a type of lie that appeals strongly to most
children. Again and again have boys--and girls, too--declared
stoically that they were guilty of some dereliction of which they
were quite innocent, to shield a friend. And most children not only
admire such acts, but will seek to defend them on moral grounds,
even when they are old enough to know what a _lie_ is. The
explanation for this is to be found in the fact that the child sees
every situation or problem as a whole; he has not yet learned to
separate problems into their component parts. A situation is to him
all wrong or all right; he cannot see that a part may be wrong,
while another part is right. Now in the case of the self-confessed
culprits, the magnanimity and heroism of the act stand out so
prominently that they quite overshadow the trifling circumstance
that the hero did _not_ do the wicked deed.
An excellent illustration of this trait of child nature came out in
an inquiry that was made a number of years ago. A child replied, in
answer to the question "When would a lie be justified?" that if the
mother's life depended upon it one would have the moral duty of
saying that she "was out, although she was really in." That is, it
would be one's duty to make the great moral _sacrifice_ of
speaking an untruth for the sake of saving the mother. Any child
will tell you, as did this one, that it would be wicked to tell a
lie to save his own life!
This suggests another type of lie that is quite common. Most
children feel their personal loyalties so keenly that they would do
many things that they themselves consider wrong for a person they
love or admire. A little girl was so much impressed with the moral
teachings of her Sunday-school teacher that she was determined to
get her a suitable Christmas present. Now, the family had not the
means to supply such a present, and Mary knew it, and was greatly
distressed by the fact. However, where there is a will there is a
way; and Mary found the way by cunningly stealing a moustache cup
from a store with the inspiring legend "To dear Father" and
beautiful red and blue roses and gilt leaves. Mary had learned that
it was wicked to steal and to lie, etc., but her heart was set on
getting something for the teacher, not for herself, and she very
unselfishly risked her moral salvation for the person she loved and
admired.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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