"Ah! who would bear Time's whips and scorns, The pangs of disprized love; When he might his quietus make By one bare bodkin's shove? Who would these fardels bear, unless That bourne he could foresee, From which no traveller returns!— To be, or not to be!" Arrangements will be made for the characters to promenade in the day, time full dressed, upon the top of the portico, to the music of the orchestra—in beef-eater's dresses. The pageant will be very splendid. A TERRIBLE RAILWAY ACCIDENT will happen, from the engine running up a cutting, and then falling back on the train. [Illustration] MAY. Several young ladies will now receive bouquets on the mornings of parties, without having the "slightest idea" from whom they come. Human glow-worms will appear hovering at night, with lanterns, round door-steps and scrapers, until the Polkas commence; when the street-doors in the newly-built houses will take to knocking themselves. A new musical court of justice will condemn offending professors to eight hours at the quadrille piano, instead of so many days at the treadmill. A hapless _pianiste_ will be found dead at the instrument, at a _réunion_ in Eaton Square, after the "after-supper cotillion." [Illustration] Several grand morning concerts will take place at the Opera Concert Room, in which every _artiste_ in London will sing or play twice. They will commence at two P.M., and always conclude in time for breakfast the next morning. An elegant little article will be invented, called "The Nutritive Lozenge; or, Concert Portable Larder," to support the existence of those who _will_ wait the programme out. Arrangements will be made with some machinery from the stage for hauling those who faint or die through the windows on to the top of the colonnade, without disturbing the rest of the audience. DREADFUL RAILWAY ACCIDENT, from the bursting of a boiler, which will blow everybody and everything into an impalpable powder. The steam will cook a number of greens in an adjacent field, and boil a number of pigs; providing a choice meal for a number of residents in an adjacent union, who will be turned out to feed for the day. JUNE.