CURIOUS DISCOVERY OF A SKELETON.—The perfect skeleton of a goose is found in November next in Thames Tunnel by a police-officer looking for an escaped criminal. The poor animal is supposed to have taken refuge there on Michaelmas day, and to have died of starvation. This little paragraph is written to record its sagacity. Readers, if you have any sympathy, you will drop a tear to the memory of that goose! Why do sailors serving in brigs make bad servants? Because it's impossible for a man to serve _two-masters_. A NOVELTY.—Prince Albert's pig does not get a prize this year. The law is a long Chancery Lane that hath no turning but Portugal Street. "OUR NATURAL ENEMIES"—tailors. "THE BOTTLE."—"Ah, my dear fellow, you're gradually drinking yourself into the grave," as the Pint Bottle said to the Quart. PROVERB JUST IMPORTED FROM BOULOGNE.—A moustache covers a multitude of debts. QUESTION AND ANSWER. _Shakspeare._—"What's in a name?" _Widdicombe._—"The continual nuisance of writing your autograph." FULL-FLAVOURED SIMILE. Men are frequently like tea—their real strength and goodness is not properly drawn out of them till they have been for a short time in hot water. * * * * * WHO SAYS IT ISN'T?—The reason so many whales are found about the North Pole is, because they supply all the Northern Lights with oil.— _Communicated by a Traveller._ [Illustration: _The Preparatory School for Fast Men._ To teach the young idea how to shoot, smoke, drink, fight, cheat, and the various accomplishments of "regular bricks." ] THE COMIC ALMANACK FOR 1849. PROJECTED LINES TO RUN THROUGH ALL ALMANACKS. MOVEABLE FEASTS.—The greatest one on record is the Barmecide Feast of Sancho Panza. FAST-DAYS.—Greenwich Fair at Easter and Whitsuntide, the Derby, the Thames Regatta, balloon days at Cremorne, and masquerade mornings at Jullien's. [Illustration: CANVASSING THE LIVERY. ] MICHAELMAS DAY.—Election of the Lord Mayor—Moses takes his measure, and rushes home to cut up the goose. LEAP YEAR.—It takes three springs to make one leap year. PURIFICATION.—It is very curious that the very day after Candlemas should be the anniversary of a "Blaize." HOLIDAY AT CHANCE. OFFICES.—The English of Chance. is Chancery. LOW SUNDAY.—Boating on the Thames, or riding in the Park on a hired horse. OLD MAY DAY.—An exiled Pole in England. LENT.—To ascertain its beginning and end, you have only to become security for a friend at a Loan Office. BARTHOLOMEW.—One of the reduced fairs. CHRISTMAS.—The Earl of A-db-r-gh presents all his servants with Christmas Boxes—of Holloway's pills. OLD LADY-DAY.—The only lady whose age is known to a day. [Illustration: THIS IS WHAT LADIES CALL A MINIATURE BROOCH!!! ]