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The Comic Almanack, Volume 2: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities — David Hume — John Shaqi

The Comic Almanack, Volume 2: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities

David Hume · en

FASHIONS FOR 1849.

The rage for flounces in ladies' dresses will grow deeper and deeper.
Two noble Duchesses will compete as to the greater number. They will
continue each time bidding one flounce over one another, till their
dresses will be nothing but flounces. The fashion is evidently borrowed
from the hackney-coachman's cape.

[Illustration:

  PORTRAIT OF A LADY OF RANK AS SHE WILL APPEAR AT THE HORTICULTURAL
    FETE NEXT YEAR.
]

Gentlemen's fashions will remain just the same, that is to say, as ugly
as ever.


                          A DREAM OF THE YEAR.
                      (AFTER PLANCHE'S "DÆDALUS.")

[Illustration: 1848]

        I'm in such a flutter I scarcely can utter
          The words to my tongue that come dancing—come dancing
        I've had such a dream, that it really must seem
          To a telegraph e'en like romancing—romancing;
        I must have got frisky on Kinahan's whisky,
          Although I don't wish you to blab it—to blab it;
        Or else 'twas a question of slight indigestion,
          Through eating too much of Welsh rabbit—Welsh rabbit.

        I dreamt Lord John Russell was dining with Fussell,
          To meet Louis Blanc and Alboni—Alboni,
        When Feargus O'Connor declared, on his honour,
          He'd only had half a polony—polony.
        On which all the Chartists and Suffolk Street artists
          Ran off to the train and got in it—got in it,
        In spite of their fears of the new engineers,
          Who blew up a boiler a minute—a minute.

        On this, Ben Disraeli, who'd burnt the Old Bailey,
          Declined being paid for his trouble—his trouble;
        And ran in a funk to the Joss on the junk,
          To prove Schleswig-Holstein a bubble—a bubble.
        So Barbés and Blanqui both looked very cranky,
          Because Jenny Lind chose to marry-to marry;
        But Thackeray cried, "If you bother the bride,
          I'll wed her at once to John Parry—John Parry."

[Illustration:

  _Female Parliament_—

  _German Parliament_—

  _Irish Parliament_—

  _A Sheet of Parliament._
]

[Illustration:

  FOUR WARNED——FOUR ARMED.
]

       I next had a row, I can scarcely tell how,
         With Van Amburgh for showing his lion—his lion,
       And stealing a sack from the widow Cormack,
         In which she had popp'd Smith O'Brien—O'Brien;
       When Soyer came up with a Summerley cup,
         Just purchased at Stowe for a shilling—a shilling,
       And told the inspector he'd give him some nectar,
         Provided they came to no killing—no killing.