The Comic Almanack, Volume 2: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities — David Hume — John Shaqi
The Comic Almanack, Volume 2: An Ephemeris in Jest and Earnest, Containing Merry Tales, Humerous Poetry, Quips, and Oddities
David Hume · en
On the 30th of October there will be a total eclipse of the Horse
Guards' illuminated clock by a tremendous fog. This eclipse is expected
to give such satisfaction, that it has already been announced for
repetition on the following evening; but after the 31st the fog will be
dropt.
On the 13th of November there will be a partial eclipse of the sun—that
is to say, the eclipse will show its partiality by being only visible to
those in a high station, who look up to it. It will first show itself to
Primrose Hill about four seconds after eight, A.M. It will look in upon
Professor Airy at the Greenwich Observatory about five minutes after
nine.
There will be a number of eclipses in the political world next year; but
we do not intend to throw any light upon them. No doubt Lord John
Russell will do his best to eclipse Sir Robert Peel, and that eccentric
planet, Brougham, will strive as much as he can to eclipse Campbell, and
throw him completely into the shade.
[Illustration:
TWELFTH NIGHT.
]
"TWELFTH-NIGHT: OR, WHAT YOU WILL."
Hail to the Twelfth-Night King! whose reign
Is short, but truly merry;
His ministers are cake, champagne,
Hot negus, port, and sherry.
His subjects are the young and gay.
Who their allegiance own;
Over the drawing-room is his sway—
An easy-chair his throne.
It once was very truly said,
By poet of renown;
Somewhat uneasy is the head
That's doomed to wear a crown.
The Twelfth-Night King is free from care,
No crown his ease can balk;
'Tis much too small for him to wear—
That little crown of chalk.
No cares of state before him rise,
No treaties, but a treat;
Sugar in every shape and guise,
Gives sweets unto his _suite_.
Hostilities he need not dread,
Like some in regal stations;
A Twelfth-Night King is at the head
Of friendliest relations.
FACTS THAT DO NOT COME WITHIN THE RECOLLECTION
OF THE OLDEST INHABITANT.
The invasion of England by the Prince de Joinville.
The liberty of the French press.
A ministry of one year's duration in Spain.
The presentation of the accounts of St. Stephen's, Walbrook.
A good engraving from the Art-Union.
A fine day in Glasgow.
HOROSCOPES MADE EASY TO THE MEANEST
CAPACITY
Of course every one knows that horoscopes are divisible into twelve
classes, and that one of the twelve Signs of the Zodiac is at the head
of each class. With this information any one with the aid of the
following learned treatise will be able to cast his own nativity or that
of any other person.
The first sign of the Zodiac is