_Master of the Show._ Now, Mr. Merryman, be so good as to tell the company—— _Merryman._ Yes, sir. (_Counts his fingers._) Ten, twenty-eleven, fourteen, two. _Master._ What are you doing, sir? _Merryman._ I'm telling them, sir. _Master._ Nonsense, Mr. Merryman. I mean you are to tell them the nature of the exhibition. _Merryman._ That's capital good. _Master._ What is capital good, Mr. Merryman? _Merryman._ Eggs and bacon. _Master._ I did not say eggs and bacon, sir. I said, exhibition. Also, the sports and pastimes— _Merryman._ That's better still. _Master._ What is better still, Mr. Merryman? _Merryman._ Pork and parsnips. _Master._ Sports and pastimes, sir (_sternly_). _Merryman._ Now I've got it. Times and passports. _Master_ (_whipping him_). Take that, sir! _Merryman._ Now keep still, can't you? You'll take all the whicksters off my calves. _Master._ Now, Mr. Merryman, inform the company the nature of the performances as exhibited before all the— _Merryman._ Exhibited before all the— _Master._ Potentates in Europe. _Merryman._ Potatoes in Europe. (_Confidentially, to the crowd._) That's a lie. _Master_ (_sharply_). What did you say, sir? _Merryman._ I said, they'd see it all by-and-by. _Master._ Dancing on the tight and slack rope— _Merryman._ Prancing on the slight and tack rope— _Master._ With a variety of ground and lofty tumbling— _Merryman._ With a variety of round and crafty grumbling— _Master._ Remember the price. Halloo! (_Through a speaking trumpet._) _Three_pence each is all we ask! Servants and working people _two_pence! _Merryman._ Recollect: be in time. All in to begin! _Three_pence each is all we ask; but we'll take as much more as you like to give us. All in there! all in! [_Exeunt company, to re appear in one minute._ * * * * * This will give a fair notion of the value of the work. In addition to a series of such helps to education, phrases, to be committed to memory, will be hung round the room. These will be principally for the pantomimists, and will consist of sentences like the following:—"Here we are again! how are you?" "Now, don't be a fool!" "Here's somebody coming!" "I saw him do it, sir!" with other similar ones. The co-operation of all friendly to the interests of the Clowns is earnestly requested to promote the welfare of this institution. THINGS TO BE BORNE IN MIND IN MAY. That there is an ancient quaint rhyme, as follows—the old almanacks having a wrong version:— "In April, Grisi opes her bill; In May, To hear her you pay; In June, She's in full tune; In July, Her benefit is nigh; In August, Take a stall you must."