The Piccadilly Puzzle: A Mysterious Story — David Hume — John Shaqi
The Piccadilly Puzzle: A Mysterious Story
David Hume · en
Near the door of the ball-room a young man of about thirty years of
age was leaning against the wall in a lazy attitude, idly watching the
dancers swinging past him; but judging from the preoccupied expression
of his face his thoughts were evidently far away. He was tall,
dark-haired, with a short cut well-trimmed beard, piercing dark eyes,
a firmly compressed mouth, and judging from his swarthy complexion
together with a certain crisp curl in his hair he evidently had some
negro blood in his veins. Suddenly he was roused from his meditations
by a touch on his shoulder, and on glancing up saw before him a stout
elderly gentleman with white hair, a ruddy face, and rather a Silenus
cast of countenance.
The one was Spenser Ellersby, only son of a wealthy West Indian
planter, and the other Horace Marton a well-known society man
generally called The Town-crier, from the fact that he knew all the
current scandals and retailed them with elaborate embellishments to
his numerous circle of friends.
"Hey! Ellersby, my boy," said The Town-crier, on the alert to acquire
fresh information "have you come back once more to England, home and
beauty--hey? been all over the world I suppose, hey?--going to
publish a book of travels--hey?"
"Not me," replied Ellersby in the slow, languid manner habitual to
him, "everyone who goes half-a-dozen miles now-a-days publishes a book
of travels under some fantastic title. I prefer to be renowned for not
having done so."
"Broke no new ground--hey?"
"No," indifferently. "I haven't the instincts of Columbus so the old
ground was good enough for me. I've done Africa in a superficial
manner, called on our American cousins, passed the same compliment to
our Australian ditto, in fact done the usual thing with the usual
result."
"Hey! what's that?"
"A sense of being bored--I agree with Voltaire to a certain extent,
'this is the best of all possible worlds,' but one does get and little
tired of it--however I have satisfied your curiosity, now return the
compliment. I've been away from England for two years so know nothing
of life in town--come unfold--tell me all--scandals, deaths,
marriages, divorces, in fact all the gossip of the hour."
This was an occupation after The Town-crier's own heart, so he
launched out into a long description of folly and fashion varied by
sermons and scandal, which being spiced with a little maliciousness
proved quite an amusing discourse. Ellersby listened in silence with a
quiet smile on his lips, every now and then giving vent to an
ejaculation as he heard some special morsel of news.
"You ought to write your memoirs, Marton," he said drily, "they would
be as gossiping as Pepys, as scandalous De Grammont, and as amusing as
either, but go on--anything more? Who are the new beauties?"
"Hey! oh! one was here to-night, Lady Balscombe."
"What! old Balscombe married," said Ellersby in a surprised tone. "I
thought he loved no one but himself--so!--and who is my lady?"