Whilst searching for a subject she took out her studies for the Faustina
picture. But she put them aside with a shudder. She was painting merely
for amusement, to gratify the artistic impulse that urged her to create.
But the hope, by which she had been gradually rising towards the goal
of her ambition, the hope of fame and full accomplishment, was gone,
apparently beyond recall; and she mused upon it sadly. This sense of
finality is characteristic of youth--its one governing pessimism. Yet
she was cheerful enough, glad to feel the brush between her fingers
again, and to smell the familiar odour of turpentine, and to see
her fancies take visible form under her touch. The artist within her
asserted itself, though vaguely, as from some depth where it lay buried.
It was undergoing a subtle change, and its weak, inchoate manifestations
were those of a period of transition. But Clytie knew it not.
The Farquharsons returned to town towards the end of the month, and
Winifred also, after her annual seaside holiday with the children. And
many of Clytie's other friends remained in London, and welcomed her back
among them. It was like a return to her old life. Only Kent was absent
from her circle. She missed him, sighing a little for the impossible.
Thornton wrote from Scotland with affectionate brevity. He did not know
that he could have missed her so much. He had bagged so many brace that
morning. He longed to see her. He thought he might as well stay on with
Carteret so long as there was any sport forward. His letters, dashed
off with a broad quill pen in a great, bold hand, covered four sides
of notepaper, and came once a week. Clytie had no reason to complain of
lack of attention on the part of her husband. Consequently she looked
forward to less troubled days when they should lead their common life
together again.