The happiest time in this Christmas visit was when she could get away
into the old lumber-attic in which she had dreamed so many girlish
dreams. It had long been dismantled of the Liberty curtains, Persian
rugs, and cheap Japaneseries that had lent it the suggestion of artistic
atmosphere the girl of eighteen had craved. It was bare now, except for
a table and chair and a few odds and ends of artist's materials, but a
fire could be laid in the grate to make things look cheery, and there
was still the deeply recessed attic-window where she could stand and
look out over the same drear landscape. It was only the ordinary midland
succession of fields, now black with winter, and pastures through
which the river ran, its course only indicated by the fringing line
of pollards and willows. Away on the slope to the west rose a clump
of trees from which peeped a few houses and a church spire, the little
village of Wexwith. In the foreground ran the highroad skirted with new
red-brick cottages, a touch of sordidness added by man to the ungenerous
dreariness of nature. Once this had affected Clytie with a sense of the
unutterable melancholy of things. The young are prone to be so affected.
They are rather proud when they realise it; it is a kind of youthful
vanity. But Clytie, like the wiser among us, sought brightness as she
grew older, and although she could not consider the landscape cheerful,
looked at it only through the memories of five years. Every spot had
associations for her. There was the cottage where she had seen the
little bully strike his playmate, the original conception of the picture
that had helped to cause her welcome banishment from home. Next to it
used to live the old beldame who threw out of doors the custards and
jellies that Janet with angelic perseverance used to take her.
What cruel mockery she used to make of Janet in those days! Now she
submissively helped to carry the custards. Behind the swelling uplands
over the village the sun set, a red ball in the wintry sky. For how many
wild fantastic daubs had not that formed a background!