THE unhappy young man rushed through the train to the railway station,
goaded by the new passion of remorse and frantic with the despair which
had driven him from the accusing horror in Olivia’s eyes. It was only
when he waited on the platform at Worcester, where he must change to the
main line, that he became suddenly aware of loss of sanity. His
suit-case, containing all the belongings which he had taken from the
flat, was lying a mile or so away at the inn where he had spent the
night. He had not slept, not even gone to bed, not even opened the
suit-case. He had dashed out before the inn was awake to catch the
earliest morning train to Medlow. And from that moment to this, just as
the London train was steaming in, both luggage and unpaid bill had
vanished from his mind. There was nothing to do but go to the inn and
proceed to London by a later train. Thus, Fate had stage-managed for him
another deception of Olivia.
The realization of his crazy lapse of memory was a sobering shock. Never
before had he lost grip of himself. Hitherto, the tighter the
corner—and he had found himself in many—the clearer had been his
brain. The consciousness of the working of a cool intellect had given a
pleasurable thrill to danger. Now, for over twenty-four hours, he had
been acting like a madman, in contemplation of which the only thrill he
experienced was one of profound disgust. To enter whatever sphere of
life the effacement of Alexis Triona should render necessary, raving
like a maniac would be absurd. It would need all his wit.
His retrieved suit-case in the rack of the third-class carriage, the
paid hotel bill in his pocket, and food, up to then forgotten, in his
stomach, he fortified himself in this decision, until exhausted nature
claimed profound and untroubled sleep.
He awoke at Paddington, homeless for the night. Now his brain worked
normally. Alexis Triona had disappeared from the face of the earth. It
was therefore essential to avoid hotels where Alexis Triona might
possibly be recognized. Besides, he knew that West End hotels were
congested, that the late-comers to London had been glad to find a couch
at a Turkish Bath. His chauffeur’s knowledge of London came to his aid.
He drove to a mouldy hotel in the purlieus of the Euston Road, and there
found a frowzy room. The contrast between the bed, its dingy counterpane
sagging into the worn hollow of the mattress beneath, the threadbare
rugs askew on the oilcloth, the blistered deal washstand and
dressing-table, the damp, dirty paper, the bleak blinds, and the sweet
and dainty appointments of the home he had left smote him till he could
have groaned aloud. Not that he gave a thought to such things in
themselves. Physical comfort meant little to him. But the lost
daintiness signified Olivia; this abominable room, the negation of her.