He went out into the garden and stood in the sun and looked almost
unseeingly at the rolling downs. Suddenly he became aware of the ribbon
of road that lost itself not far away, behind a bluff. It was the Great
High Road that led eventually to a great western port, where great ships
sailed to the South Seas. The Power seemed to impel him, as it had
impelled him as a boy to run away from home. By following that road, he
would reach the port. At the port he could ship before the mast. On
board his limp would not matter. For the rest, he was strong, as strong
as a lion, in spite of all pronouncements by the doctors. It was the one
adventure life left open to him. Nay more, the one chance of maintaining
his reason. He stood with hands clenched staring at the road, the sweat
beading on his forehead.
To pack up belongings and arrive with genteel suit-case and kit-bag at
the dock-side and expect to be taken on as an ordinary hand would be the
act of an embecile. He passed his hand mildly through his hair in his
instinctive gesture. Why not go as he was, a cap on his head, and his
money, all he had in the world, in a belt (bought for Poland) round his
waist? It was escape from prison. Escape from Myra. The final
disappearance from the orbit of Olivia.
Perhaps it was the maddest thing he had done in his life. But what did
it matter? If he crocked up, he crocked up. At least he could try. He
went indoors and in the parlour found an old railway timetable. There
were only two trains a day from Fanstead to the main-line junction, and
the morning train had already gone. Why should he not tramp to the
Junction, as in the old days, getting a lift here and there on a cart,
and know again the freedom of the vagabond road?
He went up to his room, put on his belt of money and good thick boots,
and made up a bundle of necessaries. On his dressing-table he left a
letter addressed to Mrs. Pettiland, enclosing a month’s rent. He looked
round the room for the last time, as he had looked round so many in his
life, and laughed. No books on this journey. As he had not left the
Tyneside with books years ago, so would he start now afresh, with the
same equipment. He went downstairs with a light heart, and called out to
Mrs. Pettiland busy in her post-office.
“I’m going off on a jaunt—so don’t expect me till you see me.”
And the answer came: “Don’t overdo yourself with your lame leg.”