“You are a woman of common-sense. I leave you to guess. You admit you
have n't treated me properly. You have nothing to complain of as far as
I am concerned. Now, have you?”
“How do I know? No. I suppose not, as things go. Once I did try to--to
feel more like other women--and to make some amends. I told you that
perhaps we were making a mistake in excluding sentiment. If you had
chosen, you could have--I don't know--made me care for you, perhaps.
But you didn't choose. You treated me as if I were a fool. Very likely I
was.”
“When was that?” asked Morland, with a touch of sarcasm. “I certainly
don't remember.”
“It was the last night we had any talk together--in the billiard-room.
The night before--before the garden-party.” He turned away with an
involuntary exclamation of anger. He remembered now, tragic events
having put the incident out of his mind. He was caught in a trap.
“I did n't think you meant it,” he said, hurrying to the base excuse.
“Women sometimes consider it their duty to say such things--to act a
little comedy, out of kindness. Some fellows expect it. I thought it
would be more decent to let you see that I did n't.”
There was a short silence. Norma stood in the centre of the room, biting
her lip, her head moving slightly from side to side; she was seeking
to formulate her thoughts in conventional terms. Her cheek grew a shade
paler.
“Listen,” she said at length. “I am anything bad you like to call me.
But I'm not a woman who cajoles men. And I'm not a liar. I'm far too
cynical to lie. Truth is much more deadly. I hate lying. That's the main
reason why I broke with a man I cared for more than for any other man I
have ever met--because he lied. You know whom I mean.”
He faced her with a conscious effort. Even at this moment of strain and
anger, Norma was struck again with the lurking air of ignobility on his
face; but she only remembered it afterwards. He brazened it out.
“Jimmie Padgate, I suppose.”
“I can't forgive him for lying.”
“I don't see how he lied. He faced the music, at any rate, like a man,”
said Morland, compelled by a remnant of common decency to defend Jimmie.
“All his pose beforehand was a lie--unless the disclosures afterwards
were lies--”
“What do you mean?” asked Morland, sharply.
“Oh, never mind. We have not met to discuss the matter. I don't know why
I referred to it.”
She paused for a moment. She had begun her tirade at a white heat.
Suddenly she had cooled down, and felt lassitude in mind and limbs. An
effort brought her to a lame conclusion.
“You accused me of acting a comedy. I was n't acting. I was perfectly
sincere. I have been absolutely frank with you from the hour you
proposed to me.”