Camilla; or, A Picture of Youth — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
Camilla; or, A Picture of Youth
John Stuart Mill · en
'For my mother to take leave of Eugenia and my uncle before her
journey.'
'Journey! Why whither is she going?'
'Abroad.'
'The deuce she is!--And what for?'
'To try to make your peace with her brother; or at least to nurse him
herself till he is tolerably recovered.'
Lionel slapped his hat over his eyes, and saying, 'This is too much!--if
I were a man I should shoot myself!'--rushed out of the room.
The two sisters rapidly followed him, and caught his arm before he could
quit the house. They earnestly besought him to return, to compose
himself, and to promise he would commit no rash action.
'My dear sisters,' cried he, 'I am worked just now only as I ought to
be; but I will give you any promise you please. However, though I have
never listened to my father as I ought to have listened, he has
implanted in my mind a horror of suicide, that will make me live my
natural life, be it as good for nothing as it may.'
He then suffered his sisters to lead him back to their room, where he
cast himself upon a chair, in painful rumination upon his own
unworthiness, and his parents' excellence; but the tender soothings of
Lavinia and Camilla, who trembled lest his remorse should urge him to
some act of violence, soon drew him from reflections of which he hated
the intrusion; and he attended, with complacency, to their youthful
security of perfect reconciliations, and re-established happiness.
With reciprocal exultation, the eyes of the sisters congratulated each
other on having saved him from despair: and seeing him now calm, and,
they hoped, safe, they mutually, though tacitly, agreed to obtrude no
further upon meditations that might be useful to him, and remained
silently by his side.
For some minutes all were profoundly still; Lionel then suddenly started
up; the sisters, affrighted, hastily arose at the same instant; when
stretching himself and yawning, he called out, 'Pr'ythee, Camilla, what
is become of that smug Mr. Dubster?'
Speechless with amazement, they looked earnestly in his face, and feared
he was raving.
They were soon, however undeceived; the tide of penitence and sorrow
was turned in his buoyant spirits, and he was only restored to his
natural volatile self.
'You used him most shabbily,' he continued, 'and he was a very pretty
fellow. The next time I have nothing better to do, I'll send him to you,
that you may make it up.'
This quick return of gaiety caused a sigh to Lavinia, and much surprise
to Camilla; but neither of them could prevail with him to depart, till
Mr. and Mrs. Tyrold were every moment expected; they then, though with
infinite difficulty, procured his promise that he would go straight to
Dr. Marchmont, according to an arrangement made for that purpose by Mrs.
Tyrold herself.