Camilla; or, A Picture of Youth — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
Camilla; or, A Picture of Youth
John Stuart Mill · en
'Yes,' cried Edgar, recovering, and quietly re-placing himself; 'it is
her own security, and it is the security of all who surround her; though
to those, indeed, there was also another, a still greater, in the
contrast which----' he stopt, confused at his own meaning; yet
presently, almost irresistibly, added--'Not that I think the utmost
vivacity of sentiment, nor all the charm of soul, though eternally
beaming in the eyes, playing in every feature, glowing in the
complection, and brightening every smile----' he stopt again,
overpowered with the consciousness of the picture he was portraying; but
Mr. Tyrold continuing silent, he was obliged, though he scarce knew what
he said, to go on. 'Nothing, in short, so selfishly are we formed,--that
nothing, not even the loveliest of the lovely, can be truly bewitching,
in which we do not hope or expect some participation.--I believe I have
not made myself very clear?--However, it is not material--I simply meant
to explain my retreat from Cleves. And, indeed, it is barbarous, at a
season such as this, to detain you a moment from your family.'
He then hastily took leave.
Mr. Tyrold was sensibly touched by this scene. He saw, through a
discourse so perplexed, and a manner so confused, that his daughter had
made a forcible impression upon the heart of Mandlebert, but could not
comprehend why he seemed struggling to conceal it. What had dropt from
him appeared to imply a distrust of exciting mutual regard; yet this,
after his own observations upon Camilla, was inconceivable. He
regretted, that at a period so critical, she must part with her mother,
with whom again he now determined to consult.
Edgar, who hitherto had opened his whole heart upon every occasion to
Mr. Tyrold, felt hurt and distressed at this first withholding of
confidence. It was, however, unavoidable, in his present situation.
He went back to the parlour to take leave once more of Mrs. Tyrold;
but, opening the door, found Camilla there alone. She was looking out of
the window, and had not heard his entrance.
This was not a sight to still his perturbed spirits; on the contrary,
the moment seemed to him so favourable, that it irresistibly occurred to
him to seize it for removing every doubt.
Camilla, who had not even missed her mother and sister from the room,
was contemplating the horse of Edgar, and internally arraigning herself
for the dangerous pleasure she had felt and manifested at the sight of
his master.
He gently shut the door, and approaching her, said, 'Do I see again the
same frank and amiable friend, who in earliest days, who always, indeed,
till--'
Camilla, turning round, startled to behold him so near, and that no one
else remained in the room, blushed excessively, and without hearing what
he said, shut the window; yet opened it the same minute, stammering out
something, but she herself knew not what, concerning the weather.