The mill of silence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The mill of silence
John Stuart Mill · en
“Now, Doll, I’ll have no more of it. Leave her to her gin palace and
set your pretty face to the forest. One, two, three and off we go.”
We caught our train by the tail, as one may say, and took our seats
out of breath and merry. The run had brought the bloom to my
companion’s face once more and the breeze had ruffled and swept her
shining hair rebellious. She seemed a very sweet little possession for
a dusty Londoner to enjoy--a charming garden of blossom for the
fancies to rove over.
Ah, me; how can I proceed; how write down what follows? The fruit was
to fall and never for me. The blossoms of the garden were to be
scattered underfoot and trodden upon and their sweet perfume
embittered in death.
As we walked down the platform a voice hailing me made the blood jump
in my heart.
“Renny--Renny! What brings you here? Why, what a coincidence! Well
met, old fellow! And I say, won’t you introduce me?”
“Miss Mellison--this is my brother.” I almost added a curse under my
breath.
I was striving hard for self-command, but my voice would only issue
harsh and mechanical. He had overreached me--had watched, of course,
and followed secretly in pursuit.
“How delighted I am to meet you,” he said. “Here was I--only lately
come to London, Miss Mellison--sick for country air again and looking
to nothing better than a lonely tramp through the forest and fate
throws a whole armful of roses at me. Are you going there, too? Do let
me come with you.”
Dolly looked timidly up at me. We had left the station and were
standing on the road outside.
“Oh, Miss Mellison’s shy in company,” I said. “Let’s each go our way
and we can meet at the station this evening.”
“I’m sure you won’t echo that,” said Jason, looking smilingly at the
girl. “I see heaven before me and he wants to shut me out. There’s an
unnatural brother for you.”
“It seems unkind, don’t it, Renny? We hadn’t thought to give you the
slip, Mr. Trender. Why, really, till now I didn’t even know of your
existence.”
“That’s Renalt’s way, of course. He always wanted to keep the good
things to himself. But I’ve been in London quite a long time now, Miss
Mellison, and he hasn’t even mentioned me to you.”
Dolly gave me a glance half-perplexed, half-reproachful.
“Why didn’t you, Renny?”
I struggled to beat down the answer that was on my lips: “Because I
thought him no fit company for you.”
“I didn’t see why I should,” I said, coolly. “I’m not bound to make my
friends his.”
“How rude you are--and your own brother! Don’t mind him, Mr. Trender.
He can be very unpleasant when he chooses.”
She smiled at him and my heart sunk. Was it possible that his
eyes--his low musical voice--could he be taking her captive already?
“Come,” I said, roughly. “We’re losing the morning chattering here,
Dolly. You’re not wanted, Jason. That’s the blunt truth.”
Dolly gave a little, pained cry of deprecation.
“Don’t, Renny! It’s horrible of you.”