It was a dark, chill, misty morning, likely to end in rain,—one of
those mornings when even happy people take refuge in their hopes. And
Tom was very unhappy; he felt the humiliation as well as the
prospective hardships of his lot with all the keenness of a proud
nature; and with all his resolute dutifulness toward his father there
mingled an irrepressible indignation against him which gave misfortune
the less endurable aspect of a wrong. Since these were the consequences
of going to law, his father was really blamable, as his aunts and
uncles had always said he was; and it was a significant indication of
Tom’s character, that though he thought his aunts ought to do something
more for his mother, he felt nothing like Maggie’s violent resentment
against them for showing no eager tenderness and generosity. There were
no impulses in Tom that led him to expect what did not present itself
to him as a right to be demanded. Why should people give away their
money plentifully to those who had not taken care of their own money?
Tom saw some justice in severity; and all the more, because he had
confidence in himself that he should never deserve that just severity.
It was very hard upon him that he should be put at this disadvantage in
life by his father’s want of prudence; but he was not going to complain
and to find fault with people because they did not make everything easy
for him. He would ask no one to help him, more than to give him work
and pay him for it. Poor Tom was not without his hopes to take refuge
in under the chill damp imprisonment of the December fog, which seemed
only like a part of his home troubles. At sixteen, the mind that has
the strongest affinity for fact cannot escape illusion and
self-flattery; and Tom, in sketching his future, had no other guide in
arranging his facts than the suggestions of his own brave
self-reliance. Both Mr Glegg and Mr Deane, he knew, had been very poor
once; he did not want to save money slowly and retire on a moderate
fortune like his uncle Glegg, but he would be like his uncle Deane—get
a situation in some great house of business and rise fast. He had
scarcely seen anything of his uncle Deane for the last three years—the
two families had been getting wider apart; but for this very reason Tom
was the more hopeful about applying to him. His uncle Glegg, he felt
sure, would never encourage any spirited project, but he had a vague
imposing idea of the resources at his uncle Deane’s command. He had
heard his father say, long ago, how Deane had made himself so valuable
to Guest & Co. that they were glad enough to offer him a share in the
business; that was what Tom resolved _he_ would do. It was intolerable
to think of being poor and looked down upon all one’s life. He would
provide for his mother and sister, and make every one say that he was a
man of high character. He leaped over the years in this way, and, in
the haste of strong purpose and strong desire, did not see how they