The Sorrows of Satan: or, The Strange Experience of One Geoffrey Tempest, Millionaire: A Romance
John Stuart Mill · en
This letter, folded and sealed, I sent to my wife in her own apartments
by her maid,--the girl came back and said she had delivered it, but that
there was no answer. Her ladyship had a severe headache and meant to
keep her room that morning. I expressed just as much civil regret as a
confidential maid would naturally expect from the newly-wedded husband
of her mistress,--and then, giving instructions to my man Morris to pack
my portmanteau, I partook of a hurried breakfast with Lucio in more or
less silence and constraint, for the servants were in attendance, and I
did not wish them to suspect that anything was wrong. For their benefit,
I gave out that my friend and I were called suddenly to town on urgent
business,--that we might be absent a couple of days, perhaps
longer,--and that any special message or telegram could be sent on to me
at Arthur's Club. I was thankful when we at last got away,--when the
tall, picturesque red gables of Willowsmere vanished from my sight,--and
when finally, seated in a railway smoking-carriage reserved for our two
selves, we were able to watch the miles of distance gradually extending
between us and the beautiful autumnal woods of poet-haunted
Warwickshire. For a long time we kept silence, turning over and
pretending to read the morning's papers,--till presently flinging down
the dull and wearisome 'Times' sheet, I sighed heavily, and leaning
back, closed my eyes.
"I am truly very much distressed about all this;" said Lucio then, with
extreme gentleness and suavity--"It seems to me that _I_ am the adverse
element in the affair. If Lady Sibyl had never seen _me_,----"
"Why, then I should never have seen _her_!" I responded bitterly--"It
was through you I met her first."
"True!" and he eyed me thoughtfully--"I am very unfortunately
placed!--it is almost as if I were to blame, though no-one could be more
innocent or well-intentioned than myself!" He smiled,--then went on very
gravely--"I really should avoid scandalous gossip if I were you,--I do
not speak of my own involuntary share in the disaster,--what people say
of me is quite immaterial; but for the lady's sake----"
"For my own sake I shall try to avoid it;" I said brusquely, whereat his
eyes glittered strangely--"It is myself I have to consider most of all.
I shall, as I hinted to you this morning, travel for a few years."
"Yes,--go on a tiger-hunting expedition in India,"--he suggested--"Or
kill elephants in Africa. It is what a great many men do when their
wives forget themselves. Several well-known husbands are abroad just
now!"
Again the brilliant enigmatical smile flashed over his face,--but I
could not smile in answer. I stared moodily out of the window at the
bare autumnal fields, past which the train flew,--bare of
harvest,--stripped of foliage--like my own miserable life.