How rash and presumptuous is it, besides, to set down any fixed limits
to man's knowledge! Is not every age an advance upon its predecessors,
and are not the commonest acts of our present civilization perfect
miracles as compared with the usages of our ancestors? But why do I
linger on this theme, which I only introduced to illustrate the temper
of my boyish days? As I grew older, books of chivalry and romance took
possession of my mind, and my passion grew for lives of adventure. Of
all kinds of existence, none seemed to me so enviable as that of those
men who, regarding life as a vast ocean, hoisted sail, and set forth,
not knowing nor caring whither, but trusting to their own manly spirit
for extrication out of whatever difficulties might beset them. What a
narrow thing, after all, was our modern civilization, with all its forms
and conventionalities, with its gradations of rank and its orders! How
hopeless for the adventurous spirit to war with the stern discipline of
an age that marshalled men in ranks like soldiers, and told that each
could only rise by successive steps! How often have I wondered was there
any more of adventure left in life? Were there incidents in store for
him who, in the true spirit of an adventurer, should go in search of
them? As for the newer worlds of Australia and America, they did not
possess for me much charm. No great association linked them with the
past; no echo came out of them of that heroic time of feudalism, so
peopled with heart-stirring characters. The life of the bush or the
prairie had its incidents, but they were vulgar and commonplace; and
worse, the associates and companions of them were more vulgar still.
Hunting down Pawnees or buffaloes was as mean and ignoble a travesty
of feudal adventure as was the gold diggings at Bendigo of the learned
labors of the alchemist. The perils were unexciting, the rewards prosaic
and commonplace. No. I felt that Europe--in some remote regions--and the
East--in certain less visited tracts--must be the scenes best suited to
my hopes. With considerable labor I could spell my way through a German
romance, and I saw, in the stories of Fouqué, and even of Goethe, that
there still survived in the mind of Germany many of the features which
gave the color-ing to a feudal period. There was, at least, a dreamy
indifference to the present, a careless abandonment to what the hour
might bring forth, so long as the dreamer was left to follow out his
fancies in all their mysticism, that lifted men out of the vulgarities
of this work-o'-day world; and I longed to see a society where
learning consented to live upon the humblest pittance, and beauty dwelt
unflattered in obscurity.
I was now entering upon manhood; and my father--having, with that
ambition so natural to an Irish parent who aspires highly for his only
son, destined me for the bar--made me a student of Trinity College,
Dublin.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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