A Life for a Life, Volume 3 (of 3)Craik, Dinah Maria Mulock
General
A Life for a Life, Volume 3 (of 3)
Craik, Dinah Maria Mulock
Fiction
No; and therefore I feel certain my sister is right. Ay, even putting
aside the other fact, that the discovery of his long years of deception
must have so withered up her love,--scorched it at the root, as with a
stroke of lightning--that even if she pitied him, she must also despise.
Fancy, despising one's _husband!_ Besides, she is not the only one
wronged. Sometimes, even sitting by my sister's bedside, I see the
vision of that pretty young creature--she was so pretty and innocent
when she first came to live at Rockmount,--with her boy in her arms; and
my heart feels like to burst with indignation and shame, and a kind of
shuddering horror at the wickedness of the world--yet with a strange
feeling of unutterable pity lying at the depth of all.
Max, tell me what you think--you who are so much the wiser of us two;
but I think that even if she wished it still, my sister _ought not_ to
marry Francis Charteris.
Ah me! papa said truly I was no longer a child. I feel hardly even a
girl, but quite an old woman--familiar with all sorts of sad and wicked
things, as if the freshness and innocence had gone out of life, and were
nowhere to be found. Except when I turn to-you, and lean my poor sick
heart against you--as I do now. Max, comfort me!
You will, I know, write immediately you receive this. If you could have
come---but that is impossible.
Augustus you will probably see, if you have not done so already--for he
already looks upon you as the friend of the family, though in no other
light as yet; which is best. Papa wrote to Sir William, I believe; he
said he considered some explanation a duty, on his daughter's account;
further than this, he wishes the matter kept quiet. Not to disgrace
Francis, I thought; but papa told me one-half the world would hardly
consider it any disgrace at all. Can this be so? Is it indeed such a
wicked, wicked world?
--Here my letter was stopped by hearing a sort of cry in Penelope's
room. I ran in, and found her sitting up in her bed, her eyes starting,
and every limb convulsed. Seeing me, she cried out:--
"Bring a light;--I was dreaming. But it's not true. Where is Francis?"
I made no reply, and she slowly sank down in her bed again. Recollection
had come.
"I should not have gone to sleep. Why did you let me? Or why cannot you
put me to sleep for ever and ever, and ever and ever," repeating the
word many times. "Dora!" and my sister fixed her piteous eyes on my
face, "I should be so glad to die. Why won't you kill me?"
I burst into tears.
Max, you will understand the total helplessness one feels in the
presence of an irremediable grief like this: how consolation seems
cruel, and reasoning vain. "Miserable comforters are ye all," said
Job to his three friends; and a miserable comforter I felt to this
my sister, whom it had pleased the Almighty to smite so sore, until I
remembered that He who smites can heal.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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