Beatrice inherited her mother's mental restrictions, but was endowed
with a subtlety of nature, which, aided by her circumstances, made her
yet more a being of inconsistencies and contradictions. In religion it
was not enough for her to conform; zeal drove her into the extremest
forms of ritualistic observance. Nor did care for her personal salvation
suffice; the logic of a compassionate nature led her on to various forms
of missionary activity; she haunted vile localities, ministering alike
to soul and body. At the same time she relished keenly the delights of
the masquerading sphere, where her wealth and her beauty made her doubly
welcome. From praying by the bedside of a costermonger's wife, she would
speed away to shine among the brightest in phantasmagoric drawing-rooms;
her mother could seldom accompany her, but there was always some one
ready to chaperon Beatrice Redwing. Once in the world from which thought
is banished, she seemed as thoughtless as any. Her spiritual convictions
put no veto even upon dancing. Yet her mood at such times was not the
entire self-abandonment of the girl who is born but to waltz. In spite
of the sanction of custom, she could not wholly suppress her virginal
instincts, and, however unconsciously, something in her nature held
itself aloof. She led a life of indecision. Combining in herself such
contradictory elements, she was unable to make close friendships. Her
intimacy with Mrs. Rossall, which dated from her late childhood, was not
the perfect accord which may subsist between women of very different
characters, yet here she gave and received more sympathy than elsewhere.
It was her frequent saying that she came to Mrs. Rossall's house when
she wanted to rest. Here she could be herself, could pass without
interval from pietistic argument to chatter about her neighbours, could
indulge in impulses of confession as with no one else, could put off the
strain of existence which was the result of her conflicting impulses.
But it was only during a portion of the year that she could have Mrs.
Rossall's society at other times, though no one suspected it, she
suffered much from loneliness. With her mother she was in accord on the
subjects of religion and music, but even natural affection, blending
with these sympathies, could not bring about complete unity in her home
there was the same lack that she experienced in the outer world. For all
her versatility, she was not in appearance emotional; no one seemed less
likely to be overcome by passion. Her enthusiasms fell short of the last
note of sincerity. Perhaps it was on this account that she produced no
strong impression, in spite of her beauty. Her personality suffered on
acquaintance from defect of charm. Was it a half-consciousness of this
that led her now and then into the curious affectation of childishness
already remarked? Did she feel unable to rely for pleasing upon those
genuine possessions which for sonic reason could never advantageously
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