As the cab rolled along, the intoxication produced by thoughts of past
success, as well as by ambitious plans for the future, was intensified
by the excitement of his entering into Society. The feelings of this
grown-up child were similar to those of a girl going to her first ball.
He was a prey to a fit of nerves that almost made him feel beside
himself. This power of amplifying even to fanciful dimensions
impressions of utter mediocrity in themselves is both the misfortune and
happiness of poets. To that power is due those transitions, almost
startling in their suddenness, from the heights of optimism to the
depths of pessimism, from exultation to despair; these lend to the
imagination, and consequently to the disposition and feelings, a
continual pendulum-like motion--an instability of terrible portent to
the women who become attached to these vacillating souls. Amongst such
souls, however, there are some in whom this dangerous quality does not
exclude true affection. This was the case with René. The involuntary
comparison between the present and the past so suddenly provoked by the
familiar aspect of the streets brought his thoughts round to the more
experienced friend who had witnessed his rapid change of fortune. In
obedience to one of those simple impulses which form such a charming
trait in the young--affording as they do a beautiful but rare example of
the invincible bond between the inner and the outer man--he grasped the
hand of his silent companion, saying: 'How kind you have been to
me!'. . . And seeing Claude's eyes turned upon him in some astonishment,
he continued: 'If you had not been so encouraging when I made my first
attempts I should never have brought you "Le Sigisbée," and if you had
not recommended it to Mademoiselle Rigaud it would now be mouldering on
some manager's shelf. If you had not spoken to the Comtesse Komof my
piece would not be performed at her house, and I should not be going
there this evening. I am happy, very happy, and I owe it all to you! Ah!
_mon ami_, you may think me as silly as a schoolboy, but you cannot
imagine how often I have dreamt of that world into which you are now
taking me, where the mere dresses of the women are poems, and where joy
and grief are set in exquisite frames!'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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