In the little parlor, Mrs. Barton greeted me cordially. She was a tall,
angular New England woman, dried up in body, but her eyes were still
young. I have seen many women like her down Cape Cod way. But her
presence threw me into as much confusion as if she had been some
threatening sort of an ogress. I could not fight out this matter with
Ann before her mother. And some instinct warned me that I must plunge
into my subject at once, if I wished to do it at all.
"Dinner is ready," Ann said in the midst of my embarrassment.
"This is my little grandson, William," Mrs. Barton said of a tow-headed
youngster, of three, who caught hold of her skirt.
Ann picked him up.
"Can’t you shake hands like a gentleman, Billy Boy?" she asked. "No?
Well, you don’t have to."
She swung him into a high chair opposite mine. I have never been more
embarrassed in my life. It was all so different from what I had
foreseen. I suppose I had expected some heroics. It was entirely
common-place. It was hard to keep in mind that a big moral issue was at
stake. Mrs. Barton was evidently taking my measure. And "Billy Boy"
glared at me across the table out of his big, inane, blue eyes.
Ann did the talking, telling us of the wonders of her new laboratory and
something of the personality of her chief. She looked younger than when
she went away. She had filled out considerably and her face had lost
the oldish, narrow look which I remembered. She had that surety of
gesture and tone which comes only to those who have found the work they
are fitted to. Above all she seemed happy, and contented and merry.
Each glance I stole at her told me it would be harder than I had thought
to keep my resolution. It was impossible to look at "Billy Boy," he
would have stared the Sphinx out of countenance. So I gave most of my
attention to Mrs. Barton.
When the dinner was over, we moved into the parlor for coffee. In a few
minutes Mrs. Barton took the youngster to bed. The door had hardly
closed behind them when Ann’s arms were about me. There was a broken
flood of words. I do not remember what she said. But somehow it seemed
as if I were saying it myself, so wonderfully her words expressed my own
longings. A great happiness had fallen upon me. Perhaps this passion
was not right, perhaps it was neither moral nor wise, but it was
overwhelmingly a part of me. It would have been utter self-repudiation
to deny it.
In the morning I again asked Ann to marry me. It was my last ditch.
"Don’t," she said, "dearest, don’t talk of marriage. Why? Why do you
want to take our love into a courthouse? Once for all—let’s fight this
out and be finished with it."
It was all very clear to her. Promises of love were futile. She had
loved once before, had thought it would last forever. She was glad
there had been no promises.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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