"From Ludwig," she thought; and she was right; his large clear
handwriting stared at her from the envelope, and covered three sides of
a sheet of paper which enclosed several others. Johanna seated herself
at the table and read:
"DEAR JOHANNA,--The enclosed letter, which my mother found
among the papers left her by your mother, was sent to me by the
former in her last illness. She wrote to me telling me to do
with it what seemed best to me; she had never been able to
bring herself to disturb your happiness in your reunion with
your father after so many years.
"I might assert that the same consideration has hitherto
prevented me from imparting to you the wishes of your dying
mother, but I will be as frank with you as I am with myself. I
withheld the letter because I hoped even without its aid to be
able to withdraw you from surroundings unworthy of you. I
thought that a word from me would suffice to restore you to the
home that was your own so long. I hesitated--made cowardly and
selfish as we always are by the desires of our hearts--to erect
any barrier between you, a grandchild of the Dönninghausens,
and your old friends.
"But now I have convinced myself that the old friends are of no
avail to counteract new and unworthy influences; therefore let
a voice from the grave speak to you.
"If you should heed it, and have any need either of my pen or
of my personal aid, pray command me. I shall be at my father's,
where I have certain scientific work to do, throughout the
coming winter.
"Twice to-day I have been to your door, but each time I turned
away. What could it avail me to see you again where you are?
Farewell, and let me hear from you soon.
"L. W."
To Johanna the tone of this letter seemed icy cold. Experience is
needed to detect intensity of emotion beneath exterior and perhaps
hardly-won composure. With a trembling hand she opened her mother's
letter. What could she, gentle and loving as she had always been,
require of her daughter so hard that her foster-mother had been
unwilling to impart it to her? Johanna gazed at the delicate
handwriting, its uncertain characters betraying the mortal weariness
that had possessed the writer. The touching figure of her dying mother
rose vividly in her memory, and with increasing emotion she read what
follows,--in all of which she distinctly felt the quickened feverish
throb of the poor invalid's heart.
"LINDENBAD, August 19, 1864.
"MY DEAR LOUISE,--A few hours ago you left me, and in a few
hours you will come again, faithful friend that you are, to ask
how I have passed the night. Ah, Louise! it begins so
distressingly, with such throbbing pulses and wandering
thoughts, that I would flee from myself to you as to some
shrine of the Madonna.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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