A Proposal Under Difficulties: A FarceBangs, John Kendrick
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A Proposal Under Difficulties: A Farce
Bangs, John Kendrick
American drama -- 19th century; Comedy plays; Marriage proposals -- Drama; New York (N.Y.) -- Drama
_Dorothy._ Don't mind what these gentlemen say, Jennie, but go on.
[_YARDSLEY sinks into the arm-chair. BARLOW chuckles; MISS
ANDREWS glances indignantly at him._
_Dorothy._ Pardon me, Mr. Barlow. If there is any humor in the
situation, I fail to see it.
_Barlow_ (_seeing his error_). Nor, indeed, do I. I was
not--ah--laughing from mirth. That chuckle was hysterics, Miss Dorothy,
I assure you. There are some laughs that can hardly be differentiated
from sobs.
_Jennie._ I was all took in a heap, mum, to think of a fine gentleman
like Mr. Yardsley proposing to me, mum, and I says the same. Says I,
"Oh, Mr. Yardsley, this is so suddent like," whereat he looks up with a
countenance so full o' pain that I hadn't the heart to refuse him; so,
fergettin' Hicks for the moment, I says, kind o' soft like, certingly,
sir. It ain't for the likes o' me to say no to the likes o' him.
_Yardsley._ Then you said you were engaged to Hicks. You know you did,
Jennie.
_Barlow._ Ah! Then you admit the proposal?
_Yardsley._ Oh, Lord! Worse and worse! I--
_Dorothy._ Jennie has not finished her story.
_Jennie._ I did say as how I was engaged to Hicks, but I thought he
would let me off; and Mr. Yardsley looked glad when I said that, and
said he'd make it all right with Hicks.
_Yardsley._ What? I? Jennie O'Brien, or whatever your horrible name is,
do you mean to say that I said I'd make it all right with Hicks?
_Jennie._ Not in them words, Mr. Yardsley; but you did say as how you'd
see him yourself and give him a present. You did indeed, Mr. Yardsley,
as you was a-standin' on that there Proossian rug.
_Dorothy._ Did you, Mr. Yardsley?
[_YARDSLEY buries his face in his hands and groans._
_Barlow._ Not so ready with your explanations now, eh?
_Dorothy._ Mr. Barlow, really I must ask you not to interfere. Did you
say that, Mr. Yardsley?
_Yardsley._ I did, but--
_Dorothy_ (_frigidly_). Go on, Jennie.
_Jennie._ Just then the front-door bell rings and Mr. Barlow comes, and
there wasn't no more importunity for me to speak; but when I got
down-stairs into the kitchen, mum, Mr. Hicks he comes in, an'
(_sobs_)--an' I breaks with him.
_Yardsley._ You've broken with Hicks for me?
_Jennie._ Yes, I have--but I wouldn't never have done it if I'd
known--boo-hoo--as how you'd behave this way an' deny ever havin' said a
word. I--I--I l-lo-love Mr. Hicks, an' I--I hate you--and I wish I'd let
him come up and kill you, as he said he would.
_Dorothy._ Jennie! Jennie! be calm! Where is Hicks now?
_Yardsley._ That's so. Where is Hicks? I want to see him.
_Jennie._ Never fear for that. You'll see him. He's layin' for you
outside. An' that, Miss Dorothy, is why I was a-wavin' at him an' sayin'
"pst" to him. I wanted to warn him, mum, of his danger, mum, because
Hicks is very vi'lent, and he told me in so many words as how he was
a-goin' to _do--him--up_.
_Barlow._ You'd better inform Mr. Hicks, Jennie, that Mr. Yardsley is
already done up.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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