One morning a poor woman stepped into the box and expressed a wish
to prosecute some man who had passed a bad sixpence upon her. Mr.
Flowers took the counterfeit coin and after examining it said,
"Well, I dare say the man didn't know it was a bad one: it is a
remarkably good imitation of a genuine one. I'll tell you what I
will do--I will give you a good sixpence in exchange; that will put
an end to all legal proceedings." Mr. Flowers gave the woman a
sixpenny-piece, and requested that the bad one should be broken up.
When the Court was afterwards cleared, the good-natured magistrate,
addressing me, said, "I hope, Mr. Grossmith, you won't think it
necessary to report that case. If you do, I shall be having three or
four hundred people coming to me to-morrow with bad sixpences to
exchange."
A man was charged with violently assaulting his friend. A policeman
saw the assault committed, and gave his evidence to that effect. The
complainant, however, did not appear for the purpose of pressing the
charge. When the constable had given his evidence, the defendant
shouted out, "I didn't commit the assault. I never hit him."
_Mr. Flowers_ (thinking this was the usual imputation on the
evidence of the police): Then, if you didn't do it, who did I should
like to know?
_Defendant:_ I didn't do it. 'Twas the beer that did it.
_Mr. Flowers:_ Oh, then we had better send the beer to prison.
_Constable:_ Please, your worship, the complainant ain't here. He
didn't wish to press the case.
_Mr. Flowers:_ Oh, very well. _(To the Defendant)_ There being no
prosecutor, you and your friend the beer are discharged; but I
should advise you not to become too closely associated with each
other in the future.
In a series of articles which I contributed to _Punch_, at the
beginning of the year 1884, entitled "Very Trying," I gave a skit of
this magistrate. It was in the fourth article, and was headed "The
Good-humoured Magistrate." He was extremely popular, and nobody,
from his colleagues and counsel down to the prisoners themselves,
was ever heard to say a harsh word against him.
Mr. James Vaughan (who still sits at Bow Street) was a solemn and
severe type of magistrate. Absolutely just, and yet everyone seemed
afraid of him. The just are always to be most feared. Mr. Vaughan
makes a good magistrate, but he would have been a better judge. He
has a power of "summing up" which is almost thrown away in a police
court. He would give a decision (sometimes very elaborate) in every
case that came before him. He was quite the reverse of a well-known
magistrate of Great Marlborough Street, whose object was to get
everything over as quickly as possible. I was once present at the
last-named Court when there were a number of summonses against
cabmen for delaying and obstruction. It was the custom to take all
these summonses on one day. The mode of procedure adopted by this
magistrate was as follows:
_Magistrate:_ All those who plead guilty, step forward.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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