Colin said nothing at all to interrupt this monologue. He let his friend
wear himself out, pacing up and down the narrow little cabin, which it
required but two of Lauderdale’s strides to traverse from end to end. He
had known a chance word to produce similar results before, but had never
been made acquainted with the real history of his friend’s life. He
waited now till this excitement was over, knowing by experience that it
was the best way; and, after a while, Lauderdale calmed down and came
back to his seat, and resumed the conversation where he had left it,
before his heart within him was roused to make brief utterance of its
unknown burden.
“The short and the long of it is,” said Lauderdale, “that you’re making
up your mind, by some process of your own--I’m no saying what it is--to
give up our own plan and tack yourself on to a poor failing callant
that has not above a month or two to live?”
“How do you know he has not above a month or two to live?” said Colin.
“You thought the same of me a few weeks ago. One hears of the climate
working wonders; and, if he had some one by him to amuse and interest
him, and keep him off that book, as--as Miss Meredith says--”
“Oh, ay, no doubt, no doubt,” said Lauderdale, drily. “He has one nurse
already bound to him body and soul, and maybe, if he had another to
undertake the spiritual department--! But you’re no old enough, callant,
to take him in hand, and you’re no strong enough, and I cannot say, for
my own part, that I see any special qualification for such an office in
ye,” said the merciless critic, looking at Colin in a seriously
contemplative way, with his head a little on one side. After he had
shown any deep emotion, Lauderdale, like a true Briton, despised
himself, and made as great a leap as was practicable on the other side.
“No,” said Colin, who was a little piqued in spite of himself; “I don’t
suppose I am good for much; and I never thought of being his nurse. It
is out of the question to imagine that I could be for Meredith, or any
other man, what you have been for me.”
“I’ve kent ye longer than two days,” said Colin’s guardian, without
showing any signs of propitiation, “which to be sure makes a little
difference. Though them that are destined to come together need little
time to make it up--I’ve aye been a believer, for my part, not only in
love, but in friendship, at first sight.”
“There’s no question of either love or friendship,” said Colin, with
prompt irritation. “Surely one may feel pity, sympathy, fellow-feeling,
with a man of one’s own age without being misunderstood.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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