"No, I do not believe in it," the Baroness replied, with a shake of her
pretty head, a breath of air lifting the long, silky fur of her sable
cape. "That was the one good influence my husband had over me; but he
had that. He cured me of that feeble-heartedness that dares not look the
truth in the face. The truth is that man has never discovered a trace of
a Providence, of a pity or justice from on high, the sign of anything
above us but blind and implacable force. There is no God. There is
nothing but this world. That is what I know now, and I am glad to know
it. I like to oppress myself with the thought of the ferocity and
stupidity of the universe. I find in it a sort of savage pleasure, an
inner strength."
"Do not talk like that," interrupted Madame Brion, clasping her arms
around her friend as though she were a suffering sister or a child. "You
make me feel too sad. But," she continued, pressing the hand of the
Baroness while they resumed their walk, "I know you have a weight on
your heart of which you do not tell me. You have never been happy. You
are less so than ever to-day, and you blame God for your hard fate. You
relieve yourself in blasphemy as you did to-night in play, wildly,
desperately, as they say some men drink; don't deny it. I was there all
the evening, hidden in the crowd, while you were playing. Pardon me. You
had been so nervous all day. You had worried me. And I did not want to
leave you five minutes alone. And, my Ely, I saw you sitting among those
women and those men, playing so unreasonably in the sight of all that
crowd whispering your name. I saw you sell the case you used so much.
Ah, my Ely, my Ely!"
A heavy sigh accompanied this loved name, repeated with passionate
tenderness. That innocent affection which suffered from the faults of
its idol without daring to formulate a reproach, touched the Baroness,
and made her a little ashamed. She disguised her feelings in a laugh,
which she attempted to make gay, in order to quiet her friend's emotion.
"How fortunate that I didn't see you! I should have borrowed money from
you and lost it. But do not worry; it will not happen again. I had heard
so often of the gambling fever that I wished just once, not to trifle as
I usually do, but really play. It is even more annoying than it was
stupid. I regret nothing but the cigarette case." She hesitated a
moment. "It was the souvenir of a person who is no longer in this world.
But I shall find the merchant to-morrow."
"That is useless," said Madame Brion, quickly. "He no longer has it."
"You have already bought it? How I recognize my dear friend in that!"
"I thought of doing it," Louise answered in a low voice, "but some one
else was before me."
"Some one else?" said Madame de Carlsberg, with a sudden look of
haughtiness. "Whom you saw and whom I know?" she asked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account