A Widow's Tale, and Other StoriesOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
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A Widow's Tale, and Other Stories
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Fiction; Short stories
The result was that, with many a confused and trembling thought, Nelly
granted to Fitzroy the interview he asked for. Something in her heart--a
sick sensation of giddiness and bewilderment, as if everything had gone
wrong in her life--prevented her from receiving him again at home; but
she consented to meet him (of all places in the world) at the railway
station--the noisy, bustling place where no quiet could be secured,
where anybody might see them, where, indeed, it was impossible that they
should not be seen. I wonder if any other pair ever walked about
Paddington, rubbing shoulders with the calmest suburban folk, and all
the daily commotion of the little commonplace trains, with such a
subject between them. But we never know how often we touch tragedy as we
walk about the world unconscious. They met, these two people, with such
a question between them, with all the confused and incomprehensible
intermediate atmosphere which veils two individual minds from each
other, in the midst of all the bustle and noise, in which, in their
self-absorption, they were lost as in a desert. They walked about, round
and round, in the darker corners of the great area, and at last,
overcome with fatigue and excitement, sat down upon a bench a little out
of the way, where few passengers came. I cannot tell what was in the
man's mind--if he was conscious of wrong and acting a part, or conscious
of right and only speaking as a man who felt himself to be under an
unjust imputation might have a right to do. But it became very visible
now if never before that he was a coarse-minded man, notwithstanding his
outside of refinement, and that he no longer took the trouble to attempt
to veil it as he had hitherto done. And Nelly, on the other hand, though
keenly conscious of this, accepted it as if she had always known it.
They had been together for nearly an hour, pacing up and down the gloomy
background of the great noisy station, talking, talking; and yet she did
not know with any more conviction than when they first met whether it
was he or she that was in the wrong. Was he true--a man who had acted in
all simplicity and honour--and she a woman with a bad imagination which,
had jumped at something enough to horrify a man? Nelly's mind seemed to
be enveloped in cobwebs and mists, so that she could make out nothing
clearly, though sometimes there pierced through these mists a keen ray
of light, like an arrow, which seemed to break them up for a moment and
make all plain. Ah! but it came sometimes from one side, sometimes from
another, that sudden arrow cleaving the confusion. Sometimes its effect
was to make her heart leap; sometimes to make it drop, down, down into
the depths. Oh, if she could but see into his heart! But there is no one
who can do that--not into the heart of the dearest and most near our
own--or be absolutely certain of those motives which bring the smile or
the sigh.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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