Experiments -- Fiction; High school teachers -- Fiction; Science fiction; Short stories
Mr. Tedder nodded. He approved of Mr. Formeller's method. Strictly
scientific. "I have some meat in my lunch," Mr. Tedder said. He walked
carefully around the demonstration bench, staying a good five meters
away from the potential carnivore. If the creature were a meat-eater,
Mr. Tedder had no desire to have its feeding-habits demonstrated upon
the person of a young physics instructor. Back in the stockroom Mr.
Tedder opened his brown paper lunch bag, unfolded the wax paper from
the top sandwich, and shook out a slice of pimento-loaf. He wished that
he'd brought a less plebian lunch. Pork chops, perhaps. Oh, well. Mr.
Tedder walked out into the classroom holding the slice of meat by one
ketchup-moist corner.
Mr. Formeller impaled the slice of pimento-loaf on a length of No. 8
galvanized wire the physics teacher provided. Like a keeper shoving a
flank of horse meat into a cageful of lions, the biology teacher thrust
the baited wire into the empty air above the demonstration bench.
The pimento-loaf slice disappeared.
"Carnivorous," Mr. Formeller noted with satisfaction.
"Do you suppose that the creature could get off the table and ... walk
around?" Miss MacIntire hoped that her maidenly caution wouldn't be
thought an old maid's foible.
"If it were readily mobile, it wouldn't have developed so complex
a mechanism to lure its prey," Mr. Formeller said. "Its various ...
what's the classical word, Miss MacIntire?"
"Protean."
"Yes. Its protean manifestations are a clue to its habits. It is rooted
to the spot, like a plant."
"Like Venus' flytrap?" Guenther suggested.
"Yes," the biology teacher approved. "_Dionaea muscipula_ is a cogent
example of the sort of plant I'm talking about. By the way, don't you
think we ought to name this thing? We've been calling it 'creature' and
'monster' and all sorts of things. Most unscientific."
"We might call it _Rete proteanus_," Miss MacIntire suggested from her
third-row seat. "A 'many-formed trap', you know."
"No, we want a name which suggests its origin as well as its habits."
"It's not of this world, nor of the known solar system," Mr. Tedder
commented.
"That's it. It's an extra-solar; no, an extra-galactic
being-of-many-forms."
"_Polymorph metagalacticus_," Miss MacIntire said. "Not an inspired
name, but it will do, it will suffice."
Mr. Coar stared at the empty space between the telegraph key and the
bank of lithium-reaction cells. His pot of geraniums appeared again,
then the scarlet flowers wavered, faded, and became gold-and-purple
pansies. "Polymorph it is," the principal said. His air was that of a
bishop conferring imprimatur upon a lay brother's interpretation of a
Gospel passage.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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