Hungary -- History -- Revolution, 1918-1919 -- Personal narratives; Tormay, Cécile, 1876-1937 -- Diaries
We are a pack of spell-bound sleep-walkers. The wizard glares at us with
his big, oriental eyes and pronounces his spell, which varies according
to the times: Democracy, Socialism. Yesterday the magic word was
Liberalism, to-morrow it may be Communism.
* * * * *
_November 24th._
Nights are sleepless nowadays, yet I cannot work. As if every word of
beauty had been engulfed by the mire through which I wade in day time,
I cannot form a single idea. In the dreary desert of my brain nothing
wanders but horrors: the morning brings them, and they are not banished
by the end of the day.
[Illustration: BELA KUN (KOHN).
(_To face p. 160._)]
I wrote some letters last night, and this morning I sent out for stamps.
The maid put them on the writing table before me.
What is this?—Printed across the portrait of the King, of the Queen,
across the picture of the house of Parliament, there is the black
surcharge: “Republic.” Printed over the beautiful little head of the
Queen, “Republic”: the word runs across St. Stephen’s crown on the King’s
head!
A thought that has tortured me many times since the 16th of November once
again wrings my heart: The crown, our crown....
It is not a jewel, it is not an ornament, it is not pomp, it is Hungary
itself. Kingdoms have come and gone, but there was no people in this
world to whom its crown meant so much as our crown meant to us. The
Hungarian crown is every Hungarian soul, every clod of its soil, every
Hungarian harvest. With it is torn from the country’s head not kingship
alone, but all that we have been, all that we may ever be. From century
to century the ancient symbol wrought in gold has been preserved in
an iron-bound chest up there in the religious gloom of the castle of
Buda; within the last thousand years it has only appeared in the light
of day fifty-three times, borne on the heads of fifty-three Kings—over
the Hungarian land. And once more, when a thousand years had passed, on
the day of the Millenium.... Exposed to the public view, it lay on the
altar of the Coronation Church. The people came, I saw them with my own
eyes—gray-haired peasants, workmen, lords—and bent the knee in front of
it as if before a holy thing. And I saw it on the head of King Charles
on a December day, under the ancient walls of regal Buda, amidst the
unfurled banners of sixty-three counties, amidst deafening cheers, amidst
the sound of our great, clear, national anthem.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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